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Humor Blog #17

How about it Mod, I think we need it!
HUMOR BLOG # 17 (I think its 17!)

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 ---NV_Barbara on 6/22/06
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Late for school?
---Pharisee on 2/8/08

Man, this is a hard room!
You know on the fishing shows on TV they always throw the fish back after they're caught? They don't want to eat them, they just want to make them late for something..
---NV_Barbara on 4/14/07

When my daughter was very young she picked at her lip non stop. My mom told her that if she didn't quit picking at her lip, she wasn't going to have a lip. My grandmother, who had no teeth, giving the illusion that she had no lips, was visiting my mom the day my mom told my daughter she wouldn't have a lip if she kept picking at it, and my daughter looked at me and said, "is that what happen to nanny?" She thought my grandmother picked her lips off. I busted out laughing.
---KathyLH on 6/30/06

My pregnant sister thought that her 4 years-old daughter could understand the whole details when she asked mommy, "How do you get pregnant?" So she told her.

Afterwards, she asked daughter, "Do you have any questions?" Daughter was quiet for a while.

Then her eyes got big as she blurted out, "You let Daddy do THAT to you twice??"
---John_T on 6/29/06

One time my middle child, who was around 9 or so, asked if he could do something I thought was a little too old for him. When I told him no, he continued to ask as if I hadn't said a word. In my frustration, I said, "What part of "no" don't you understand." With the quick, spontaneous wit of the house clown (we have two...pray for us please) he said, "The N and the O." I just slunk off into the bedroom to laugh. He was too quick even for me.
---Linda6563 on 6/29/06

I was out walking with my 4 year old daughter. She picked up something off the ground and started to put it in her mouth. I took theitem away from her and I asked her not to do that.
"Why?" my daughter asked.
"Because it's been laying outside, you don't know where it's been,
it's dirty and probably has germs" Ireplied.
At this point, my daughter looked at me with total admiration and asked,
---mary on 6/29/06

"Wow! How do you know all this stuff?"
"Uh," ,"All moms know this stuff. It's on the Mommy Test. You have to know it, or they don't let you be a Mommy."
We walked along in silence for 2 or 3 minutes, but she was evidently pondering this new information.
"OH...I get it!" she beamed, "So if you don't pass the test you have to be the daddy.
Exactly" I replied back with a big smile on my face and joy in myheart.

No offense Dads...hehehe
---mary on 6/29/06

So many serious blogs on the forum, I need the break from reading all the arguing I come here. But it looks like we're the only ones who are taking a break, we may as well be writing e-mails to each other!
---NVBarbara on 6/27/06

Well Barbara the only thing I can say is I am glad this blog is 17.
The next one will be 18 and old enough to go out on its own.
---Elder on 6/27/06

I didn't say being a 'sick puppy' was a bad thing Elder! You're just my style! As we all know, I'm a little warped.
---NV_Barbara on 6/25/06

Com'on Barbara, I know you have told that joke or E-mailed it to someone already. Com'on say it ain't so. And... I may not be the (that) Indian but thank the Lord I ain't the Buffalo.
---Elder on 6/24/06

You're a sick puppy Elder!
---NV_Barbara on 6/24/06

An Indian walks into a cafe with a shotgun in one hand pulling a buffalo with the other.
He says to the waiter, "Me want coffee."
The waiter says, "Sure, Chief, coming right up."
Cond #2
---Elder on 6/23/06

Cond #2
He gets the Indian a tall mug of coffee. The Indian drinks the coffee down in one gulp, turns and blasts the buffalo with the shotgun, causing parts of the animal to splatter everywhere, then just walks out.
The next morning the Indian returns. He has his shotgun in one hand pulling another buffalo with the other.
Cond #3
---Elder on 6/23/06

Cond #3
He walks up to the counter and says to the waiter, "Me want coffee."
The waiter says, "Whoa, Tonto!" We're still cleaning up your mess from yesterday. "What was that all about anyway?"
The Indian smiles and proudly says, "Me in Training for United States Congress. Me come in, drink coffee, shoot the bull, leave mess for others to clean up, disappear for the rest of the day."
---Elder on 6/23/06

Barbara if those fish haddn't been outta their school they never would'a got caught.
---Elder on 6/23/06

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Rats, I should have put my 'Soap song' here instead of the 'Soap Opera' blog! Why do they call it an 'opera' anyway? Do people sing on there?
---NV_Barbara on 6/23/06

Yeah late for dinner.
---Helen_5378 on 6/23/06

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