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He's Twice My Age

I've been 'dating' someone twice my age and he just fell into place in my life. I haven't really told anyone about our relationship because I don't want to ruin a new, good thing just yet. I just wanted to know some of the reactions people have gotten from their family, friends, etc..

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 ---Rachel on 12/6/06
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Being that this was almost six years ago, he is no longer twice her age,
The age gap gets smaller and less significant as the years go by.
There was a time when I was three times older than my now wife, and then just twice as old, now not even half again as old.
It is all relative. The point is to honor God in all relationships, the 2 Royal Laws of Liberty.
---micha9344 on 3/25/14

I have Christian friends who have 19 years between their ages. The really unusual part of this is that HE is the younger one.

They are extremely happy. From their looks it is obvious that she is quite a lot older but from their behaviour and attitude to things they are very equally matched. All members of both families are completely happy about the relationship (which has lasted for 16 years, with more to go I hope). She is 71 and he is 52. She preaches and he supports her in doing so.
---Rita_H on 3/23/14

I am 24, and my husband is 46, we met when I was 20, and we are now married with two beautiful children.
It does have it's difficulties as does any marraige, sometimes it just takes more work, he's had his wild times and learned from his mistakes, I'm still making them and he is learning to have patience with me, it's a lot of work, but it is worth it if God blesses it.
---Mary_y on 3/21/14

In many circumstances, the age difference is an issue,but I feel that it is up to both you and your friend to decide if it's an issue for your relationship.I am in a relationship with a man who is 15 years older than I am and,it works.Sometimes you hear about how women mature faster than men and I think that in my case, even though we're different ages,we both are maturity wise ,the same age.Anyway,if you have really true and understanding friends, then they should be more concerned about your happiness.
---Melia on 9/9/07

Pardon me, but this seems like a NEW relationship, and in your mind, he just fell into place in my life &I haven't really told anyone about our relationship because I don't want to ruin a new, good thing.

How old are you both?
What is/was his marital status?
Why have you left friends/parents/coworkers out of the loop?

Too many red flags here to give anyone advice. My gut tells me that this is NOT a God-honoring relationship.
---John_T on 12/27/06

Hi, age doesn't matter as long as you are equally yoked and you are of age by law. God wants us to follow the law as long as it is lined up with his word. I am married to a man 59, I am 30. My family was okay as long as he treated me good.
---Rachael on 12/26/06

To Rachael continued...
We have a son together and we want one more together. As long as you are equally yoked and love eachother and treat eachother good and of age by law you have nothing to worry about. if you are under age, if he loves you he will wait for you to turn 18.
---Rachael on 12/26/06

Susie, I'm a bit confused. Had you previously made a comment to me, I have looked in the past blogs and cannot find it. God Bless.
---jason on 12/7/06

I'm sorry susie I didn't notice that I should have been upset with you =) could you please tell me so i can forgive you? =)
---Jared on 12/7/06

Oop! I meant Jason! Not Jared! Sorry, had a blond moment.
---Susie on 12/7/06

Rachel. How can we really give you accurate advice if we dont know how old you are? If you are under age than this could be a dangerous situation for the both of you!
Otherwise, if your both of age and believe in Christ as the center of your lives and it's God's will that you should be together than God bless your relationship.
---John on 12/7/06

It doesn't matter what anyone thinks but God. If both of you are born again and are Biblically in a position to qualify for marriage, there is nothing in scripture to refute your getting married. Just like black and white. Society may not like it but the Bible would have no objections to it IF both are lost or both are born again. My Grandfather was 28 and Grandmother 14 when they married. They raised 18 kids in a Godly Christian Home and were married for 57 years when he died.
---jason on 12/6/06

Hellooo Rachel and Rachel R.
Are you equally yoked? Spiritually.
Any children in your age bracket?

---Rachel*** on 12/6/06

I believe it is wrong. That could be my own problem however, there will be people who don't approve. Some will be your family... some will be his... some will act happy for you and secretly think it's disgusting...I imagine most will. There was a couple that just got married...her 19, him 29 and I heard what they didn't. If you truly feel this is who God wants to be your husband than you won't care what others think. I imagine it's not God's choice otherwise you wouldn't have asked.
---m on 12/6/06

To expand on my own personal beliefs... I think it is wrong mostly because alot of people want younger mates for the wrong reasons. It makes them feel young, they look good, they are proud they got someone much younger than them, they are middle-aged and haven't grown up yet or are still acting like a high schooler, they want to control the younger person or mold them, the list goes on and on. Where would we be at if we all dated people half our age.
---m on 12/6/06

If a guy dates an 18yo & he is much older, I wonder how young he would go if it wasn't illegal? Some people have issues they need 2 deal with. Younger women esp. don't assert themselves & r very easy-going with an older man. Some men take advantage of this instead of learning how 2 get along & compromise w/their mate. In Biblical times it was acceptable. It's not now. Much the same as cultures where it's acceptable for men 2 hug & means something different if done where it isn't a social custom.
---m on 12/6/06

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If you're hiding this new, good thing, you're concerned about reactions from family - is it really falling into place?
---Cindy on 12/6/06

It depends on what age you're talking about. Are you 15 and he's 30? Are you 20 and he's 40? Makes a big difference. My husband was 10 years my senior, we were 20 and 30 at time of marriage, lasted over 38 years.
---Nan on 12/6/06

Hey is much better [in my opinion] to marry a man who is older...than one who is younger...a man who is older, mature, stable and financially secure makes a good protector/provider. Be sure he has the qualities of a may be hard letting a man take the lead if he reminds you of your little brother or nephew...but for the sake of his masculine identity and for the sake of your feminine identity...the man should be Man...Rachel...
---Reiter on 12/6/06

Look at the 'big picture' Are you prepared to be his care taker, if required? What about children? (Many older people can only deal with young children for a limited time.) What about the social life. Are these the same? Example: you may want to go out, but he may be content just to sit in front of TV. There are other things to consider, but I'm only allowed 85 words. Bottom line: it's your future, and while opinions of others may be important - you must make the final decision.
---wivv on 12/6/06

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This relationship problem is more than just the age difference. What is this person's marital status? You would not be keeping it a secret if it were an acceptable relationship.
---Sally on 12/6/06

Being an abuser has nothing to do with a person's age. Please do not think that the domestic abuse was a result of age. Violence happens in all age groups.
---Sally on 12/6/06

Rachel, I'm not sure I understand your question. Are you asking if we've dated someone twice our age and have gotten reaction from family and friends? I dated and married someone 8 years younger than I was, and they all told me it was a mistake, and guess what? They were right. He ended up being so immature, and beating me up the last 8 months of our marriage. Does he love Jesus with all of his heart and soul? Does he Obey the word of God at all cost?
---Donna9759 on 12/6/06

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