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When To Leave Someone

How does a person know when they should move on? When are you with the wrong partner?

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 ---traci on 3/9/07
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its difficult, spirit says move on, soul says give it one more try. i met guy on christianet in Oct 2006. we agreed to marry, i visited about 350km away in Dec. now he's acting strangely, doesnt call as regularly as he used. doesn't reply my email as regularly to. says he doesn't have money for internet cafe,he is not working.but when i vist his profile on christianet to send him card i find he logged on, obviously its time to move on, but just can't.
---Rati on 11/14/07

Do you have things in common? Are you both christians in the true sense of the word not by the talk, but by the walk? Is there friendship? respect? love? If there are not these things, you are most certainly with the wrong partner. I have been married close to 20 years now, it has been a difficult road for me.
---Cynthia_1 on 4/1/07

If God wants you to stay, then, He will give you the grace to stay. If He wants you out, then God will move you out,perhaps in any number of ways. One time with me, it was the gentle prompting of the Person of the Holy Spirit.
---catherine on 3/16/07

When you cannot find a way to communicate, hit the road Jack!! Besides that,everything is salvageable. It only takes patience ,courage,determination,flexibility,listening, You cannot solve a problem if your not aware of it. Don't jump to conclusions. Do you know what's going on in your partner's head? Ask!!!!!!You could be in a perfect relationship and you don't know,yet!!! That little voice inside you,listen to it. It's God telling you, the answer's there.Listen to your little voice, me,God,your Savior!!
---Raymond on 3/11/07

You didn't state if there was any vows made or if you are one flesh with this person. If not then you are free to go. If yes then work at your relationship. Mercy, forgiveness, and love are 3 things that are needed to make any relationship work. Remember, that with the same measure you give to your fellow man, it will be repayed to you by the Lord.
---john on 3/11/07

Rati, your first clue should have been lack of a job. #2. Upon meeting the guy, he lost interest.
Now then, pursuit of a lost cause borders on obsession. Checking up on his internet habits...if he was living in your town, would you be watching his house? Doing drivebys, watching? That would be stalking. So get yourself together and stop following this person, even if it's on the web.
---anonymouse on 3/11/07

Rati, Oct 2006, is a long time ago.

Obsessing about finding someone is not healthy. The Holy Spirit does not drive someone to pursue someone relentlessly; especially when that person is completely wrong for us. Pursue Jesus Christ and He will work out your love life.
---anonymouse on 3/11/07

I went thru this at age 59 after 29 yrs of marriage, and many years of abuse ,aggravation of living with a man wanting one way of life and me another, me Godly him very ungodly. I stayed because I did not want to fail, then one day god spoke to my heart when I was pondering on leaving to move on and trust him, I did and I am so very happy for the first time in my life, I would not trade that move for a million dollars and I like money honey, ha ha, pray and let God be your guide.
---Geraldine on 3/11/07

It is a shame we marry for lust instead of love. When the lust wears off, it is time to find a new partner for awhile. With love, it grows stronger every day. I have had problem in my marriage, but we worked thing out because of love. We have been married almost 35 yr. The best time to move on is death, till death do us apart.
---Rev_Herb on 3/11/07

what is God telling you about the relationship? listen to him!!
---makgomo on 3/11/07

lorra: You are kidding, right? My daughter dated for four and a half years before her husband popped the question. His brothers dated longer than that before proposing. My daughter has been married for five years now and is expecting my first grandchild. There is no hard and fast rule about length of dating and proposals. Bad advice.
---Madison1101 on 3/10/07

If you are dating, and you have not progressed to being engaged to marry by the end of 18 months, it is time to break it off. After that you will just get comfortable and it will be harder to break-up. But if you have not decided to marry by then, there is something that is not right between you. I know that this is hard, but this is advice from my Grandmother and she was married for more than fifty years and our extended family has enjoyed enormous marital success with that advice.
---lorra8574 on 3/10/07

It depends! If you are married, you are in a covenant relationship and are not permitted by God to "walk away" for anything but infidelity. If you are dating and feeling ncomfortable or uneasy, that could be a big, fat, flashing, red neon sign to get while the getting is good, as the old saying goes. Pray about it and search God's Word. You will find an answer to either dilemma if you search with all your heart. Be obedient and you can't lose. Be disobedient and you will SURELY lose.
---Crystal on 3/9/07

Rati...I'd say he had expectations that were not met when you met him. Internet relations are usely in the mind in the first place. when you meet someone in person that "day dream" is shattered.
---Susie on 3/9/07

You just answered your question. If there's an element of doubt, get out.
---CupidsArrow on 3/9/07

Partner???? You mean like a business partner? Or do you mean a marriage partner? Or do you mean "partner" in the worldly sense? It all depends on how you are using this word.
---Susie on 3/9/07

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You said partner, that does not mean marriage to me. Partner (business, dating, cohabitation, roommate), yes?
---CupidsArrow on 3/9/07

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