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Remarrying After A Divorce

Is remarrying after divorce an unforgivable sin? Am I truly damned? Even if my husband before was very unfaithful?

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Marriage is a once in a life time experience except in death which unfortunately separates and allows you to remarry again because your spouse is dead. Matt 19 may be settling a despite over what constitutes adultery, and you may well find you are not in the position to remarry.
There are no scriptures to indicate that you can remarry, you should have remained unmarried which is certain and this post suggests that you know full well god is not the author of this marriage.
---Carla on 5/25/10

Generally those who are divorced will seek to re-marry despite their circumstances.

while I was single, this lady in my church introduced me to her recently divorced sister.

Her sister felt since both she and her husband were Christians, divorce was not an option, so she often used the threat of divorce against her husband as a means of control over him.

One morning,he simply took her down to the lawyer and she signed the papers, expecting him to back down. It was only later she realized what she had done. He moved out and re-married 3 years later.

She remains unmarried, raising her 2 children by herself.

Some people are incredibly stupid. One should never take marriage vows for granted.
---lee on 9/3/09

unpardonable sin.your still alive and can repent.your spouse was unfaithful do you now believe you can do the same.didnt your vows say till death due us made that to each other and to God.we can remain single after divorce,reconcile,wait till they die.or live in sin.the choice is yours alone.i know you feel conviction in your heart to even ask the question you know God is calling you to be flee living in sin.i live single after my divorce and she was unfaithful and has remarried. i take up my cross daily, bear the hurt and pain of divorce too.i wont allow satan to take me down the road where i dont belong.she may never come back . i will stand before God and know in my heart i served him not my needs .he will him.
---pat_miaoulis on 9/2/09

//There's no indication anywhere Christs teaches marriage changed from what God originally planned, a woman cannot remarry then or now unless her husband is dead.

And there is no indication anywhere that God intended man should sin in the first place and there is nothing in Scripture that prohibits re-marriage especially for the innocent party.

In any case, Biblically oriented churches today believe divorce is a forgiveable sin and they also believe re-marriage can be permitted under certain conditions.

To those who are in churches that do not honor Christians to repent of their sins and be restored, the reasonable alternative is to leave such a legalistic church for one that is more loving & biblically oriented.
---lee on 8/31/09

Measure up,

Measure up, where have you measured up to what the word said, you delve in and out of the Old Testemnet as though you are Jew, (Your Gentile) The Law was written and fulfilled long before you were a twinkle in your mothers eye,

There's no indication anywhere that Christs teaches that marriage changed from what God originally planned, a woman cannot remarry then or now unless her husband is dead.

Mat 19:9 confirms that only through fornication can a man divorce his wife not visa versa, you measure up to an accursed gospel the same one Lee taught for 50 yrs in His church but from what the Holy bible states 1 Cor 7, a woman is to remain unmarried find where it says otherwise!
---Carla3939 on 8/31/09

I also believe in your belief system tiffany. Well said.
---Rod on 8/30/09

I am a frim believer that EVERYTHING I have messed up, God makes BEAUTIFUL. I think the hardest thing is forgivng ourselves and those who hurt us. We need to support each other. It really is between you and God.
---Tiffany on 8/30/09

Now I know what it's like to wake up in the Twilight Zone. I thought that weird music sounded familiar.
---ralph7477 on 8/30/09

ralph, I didn't make it personal, you did.

Brother, if you will research behind the discussion that Jesus had with the pharisees, you will see they are talking about the laws of marriage in Duet. ch22-24. Glenn is right. You are in my prayers because you are still so bitter. Its in the words you speak. The harshness in your words tell me that you still hold onto what ever pain God is trying to delive you from. Yes, we can get married if we divorced under biblical terms. Thats for certain.
Oh, Im not in a tirade. Im stating a fact. You get upset when someone disagrees with you and gives scripture to back it up.
yes, you gave your opinion, BUT it doesnt line up with the bible. Thats what we are to measure from, correct?
---miche3754 on 8/29/09

Yes Glenn & Carla, it is time you let the word speak for itself.

It is interesting that you would fault those ministers of the Gospel from Biblical oriented churches that believe repentance, restoration and re-marriage.

Of course you two really know God's word more so than those who have made it their life's career.

Yes indeed, I would encourage believers to stop 'flogging a dead horse' and move to a more Biblically oriented church if branded as being an adulterer.
---lee on 8/29/09


You are waisting your time bro give the word and leave it there, those who wish to turn from their Adulterous ways will find peace and those that wish to distort the truth blindly rejecting the word can continue to lead the blind.

Jesus clearly told the disciples to let the dead bury their dead!

Your flogging a dead horse!
---Carla3939 on 8/29/09

Boy, my question really hit a nerve.

Miche, you started the discussion with me by asking my viewpoint. I've answered your questions directly and politely. For somebody who is apparently confident in her point of view, you certainly go to great lengths to justify it.

Not sure why you decided to make the discussion personal, but if you ask 9 out of 10 people to read our exchange and vote on which one of us sounds the most "bitter" I think you might be surprised by the result.

I'm at a loss trying to figure out when I've ever said that you should not speak. In fact I'm glad you went on your tirade. Every once in awhile I like to be verbally berated by a female. It reminds me why I stay single.
---ralph7477 on 8/29/09

Ralph, is there ever a day when you aren't a smart mouth?

I suppose you didn't read my post all the way through. I said the laws of marriage are important because those are the ones Jesus was addressing to the Pharisees.Before Christ, we could divorce for any reason. After Christ, only for adultery.
I guess you being a man, are full of knowledge right? Im just a lowly woman that should not be allowed to speak in Ralphs' world since hes bitter and could not live up to God's standard for a husband. I guess Ill continue to be your whipping post for what ever woman damaged you so bad. If God runs your life, why are you so bitter? How do you expect God to restore you when you are holding on to your past mess? Brother, you are in my prayers.
---miche3754 on 8/29/09

Miche, Deuteronomy is full of laws. How many other Jewish laws do you apply to your life in the form of Christian doctrine?
---ralph7477 on 8/28/09

//A believer isnt held accountable for the unbelieving spouse divorcing them.

That been my complaint, all too many Christians believe we should kill our wounded. They simply do not understand one can become a victim of someone else's failure to honor the marriage vows. They really want to take it out on the innocent party by denying them the right to some of their basic needs.

Fortunately, most pastors of Biblically oriented fundamentalistic churches recognize the need for restoration and re-marrage. Of course those that argue against that truly believe themselves superior spiritually than those we have as our spiritual leaders.

To all, if your church teaches it is a sin to re-marry after repentance, find a better church.
---lee on 8/28/09

Brother, how can you be dumbfounded when God gave the laws for divorce and remarriage to Moses in Duet. chapters 22 through 24?
Jesus was addressing specifically what the Pharisees asked him about divorcing for any reason. Jesus said we can't for any reason or we commit adultery. The divorce has to be based upon adultery (fornication, etc.).
Paul said if the unbelieving spouse wants to stay, then stay with them. if they want to divorce, then let them go. A believer isnt held accountable for the unbelieving spouse divorcing them. That means they can get remarried because they aren't the ones who committed sin.
when Glenn said divorce for lying about virginity, hes right, thats marriage under false pretenses. One based upon a lie.
---miche3754 on 8/28/09

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Miche, I read all the verses that Glenn posted.

Frankly, I'm dumbfounded by some of the conclusions he has drawn from those verses.

That's all I'll say on the subject.
---ralph7477 on 8/27/09

My suggestion to you then, Ralph, is read the scriptures that Glenn has posted. I did.
And I got a better understanding of what Jesus means in those verses.
If a person has repented of a divorce, then they are forgiven and God remembers that sin no more. That means they can get married again.
Not to mention, divorcing because of adultery is grounds in God's eyes for divorce. God himself divorced Israel for the exact same reason. BUT, God will forgive them if they repent. Jesus was telling the Pharisee that they can't divorce FOR ANY REASON. It must be for adultery only. That includes women divorcing their husbands for adultery too.
---miche3754 on 8/27/09

Miche, as I've said before, it's not a matter of my beliefs. A Christian is one who follows Christ and his teachings. If He said it, then that's what I believe. If I ignore His teaching and follow something contradictory, then I wouldn't be a Christian, would I?

Lee posted two verses where Jesus taught that a man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery. As far as I know, adultery is a sin, is it not? I don't know what all the confusion is about. Perhaps the confusion is caused by following what the "church" says or what "seminary trained pastors" say instead of what Christ says.

Of course, there are seminary trained pastors and churches that will marry two men or two women. I'll stick with Jesus.
---ralph7477 on 8/27/09

ralph **Does that (being forgiven) give license to purposely engage in the sin?

Do we have any license at all to sin again once we know that something is a sin? God forbid! says Paul in Romans 6:15.

I have yet to see anything on this tread that would indicate scripture forbids the re-marriage of someone divorced, one that is repentant or the victim of someones unfaithfulness.

BTW, in case you like to continue to judge, my marriage has lasted over 30 years now and I have seen lots of cases involving divorce.

But what I try to do is to avoid my own prejudice against those divorced and re-married and simply let the Scripture speaks for itself.

Perhaps your view is motivated by some unfavorable experience.
---lee on 8/27/09

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Receiving Jesus as Lord and Savior prevents damnation. Jesus prohibited divorce except for adultery, that included lying about ones virginity. The non adulterer could remarry. The adulterer, and anyone marrying one, is entering a prohibited marriage. A divorce without cause, was no divorce, and so, another marriage was a type of bigamy. The exception is in 1Corinthians 7:15. If the unbeliever departs, the Christian can remarry because the marriage was not 'in the Lord'. Matthew 19:9, 1Corinthians 7:27-28 allow remarriage.
Deuteronomy 22:17-19, 28-29, 24:1-4, Proverbs 2:17 (forsaketh husband), Isaiah 54:4-8, Jeremiah 3:1, Malachi 2:14-16, Matthew 5:31-32, 19:3-12, Mark 10:2-12, Luke 16:18, 1Corinthians 6:15-16, 7:10-17, 27-28.
---Glenn on 8/27/09

All new covenant reasons for divorce and remarriage
Have a christhearted common thread. Christ will "never leave us or forsake us". But He will allow us to leave or forsake Him.
Forsaking, refers to forsaking the one flesh covenant,
Through sexual intimacy of any kind, with any other.
Leaving, refers to a willful choice to abandon the
other. Attempting to get ones spouse to forsake or leave, so you can APPEAR to be Christlike, is nothing less than demonic.
Yet if you possess Christs heart, which would prevent
You from accepting sexual intimacy from another, or trying to get them to leave you, and you have been forsaken, you are free to remarry.
Do you havd Christs heart? Yes/ No

---Doug on 8/27/09

Miche, where or when have I ever stated that I believe a person can not divorce because of adultery?
---ralph7477 on 8/26/09

Because of the many statements you have made to me and others. If I have assumed, then I apologize.
Do you believe those have divorced biblically, can get remarried?
Remember the Laws God gave Moses on this in Duet. chapters 22-24 and what Jesus said.
By the way, I never said "my interpretation" I have always said either what God says, Jesus says, or the Bible says. All are the same. When discussing this, we have to take all scripture into consideration.
---miche3754 on 8/27/09

//Does that give license to purposely engage in the sin?

Getting married, even for a second time is nowhere found within scripture to be sin.

Once a sin is forgiven, the slate is wiped clean,however, one may not commit the same sin of divorce, etc. over again.

Those that are broken need to be restored but unfortunately contrary to what you think, the needs for companionship, intimacy, support,etc. are still within that person. They do not miraculously vanish upon the divorce decree.

Of course, there are those that believe we really need to kill our wounded. Interesting that our spiritual leaders continue to marry those who are divorced,perhaps they do not know the Bible or its Author as well as you do.
---lee on 8/27/09

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//You at least recognize that remarriage is indeed sin as you state that it is not unforgivable

You got that one totally wrong!

What is a sin is divorce in the first place, not re-marriage of the repentant believer.

Obviously you do not believe one may repent of sin, and apparently you believe one should never be restored to the point he or she may have a full meaningful spiritual life.

Don't you find it interesting that those the Lord has called into the ministry believe as I do, that upon repentance of sin, may be re-married.

Perhaps you are more knowledgeable of the Bible and its Author than those who have been trained in the seminaries.
---lee on 8/27/09

Well Lee, if you believe the Bible, Jesus made both statements. In Luke, Jesus talks about how a husband commits adultery. In Matthew he talks about how a husband causes his wife to commit adultery. Two distinct subjects. Or didn't you pick that up?

Isn't it interesting that in both verses he unequivocally declared that a man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery.

You at least recognize that remarriage is indeed sin as you state that it is not unforgivable. Does that give license to purposely engage in the sin? Murder is also a sin which is forgivable. Would you counsel a Christian to proceed with his plans to kill in light of that fact?
---ralph7477 on 8/26/09

Lk. 16:18 Everyone who divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery, and he who marries a woman divorced from her husband commits adultery.

Mt. 5:32 But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.

Ralph, which did Jesus say? As we read it in Matthew having the exception clause, or in Luke which does not?

In any case, divorce & re-marriage for whatever reason is not an unforgiveable sin and the church seeks restoration of those who have sinned or at least those who were victimized by another unfaithfulness.
---lee on 8/26/09

You guys are something else. My "interpretation"? My interpretation is nothing more than repeating Christ verbatim.

What does it matter what the "church" (whose church?) has permitted? What does it matter what most pastors say? We don't ultimately answer to the church or to a pastor. We answer to God do we not?

You will also find that a significant percentage of pastors don't believe in Hell. Some don't even believe in heaven. Does that make those viewpoints legitimate?

Lastly, a pastor who divorced and remarried is only problematic if he did so outside the parameters Jesus' gave.
---ralph7477 on 8/26/09

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Miche, where or when have I ever stated that I believe a person can not divorce because of adultery?
---ralph7477 on 8/26/09

ralph - **what does any of that have to do with your decision to discount the plain, straightforward words of Christ?

I have virtually no problem at all with the 'plain, straigtforward words of Christ', it is YOUR INTERPRETATION of that Word that is problematic.

The church has always permitted re-marriage under certain conditions, and you may not know it, but most pastors of Biblical oriented churches will say there can be forgiveness as well as restoration. They do indeed, recognize second marriages.

You even find some ministers of fundamentalist churches that are divorced and re-married.

Suggest "Marriage, Divorse, & Remarriage in the Bible' by Jay E. Adams, that most counselors use on this issue.
---lee on 8/26/09

So you don't believe that man/woman can divorce for adultery even though God/Christ says they can?
If so, how do you come to that conclusion and why?
You see the laws for it in Duet. chapters 22 through 24 and what God did to Israel.
You see what Christ says clearly on it in all the Gospels. You see what Paul says about it.
I am just wondering where you get your conclusions from?
And please try to be nice. I am only asking questions to understand where you are coming from.
---miche3754 on 8/26/09

The bible states that you may not divorce except for adultry. If your spouse leaves and divorces you for someone else you are not under bondage to that person. If you leave your spouse for someone else you have committed adultry and are under bondage and therefore have committed a sin and broken one of the ten commandments. I believe a true believe would not jepordize their salvation. The bible says it is not possible to get true salvation back. It states it is better to never have been born then to return to your sinful ways. "It's like a dog eating his own vomit".
---Rhonda on 8/26/09

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If your husband left you and or was unfaithful you are free to marry again. If you are a member of church I suggest you do not fornicate with the person you are with until you are married to him. This is considered a sin. If you are not a born again christian then then it's no different then any other sin. There are no big sins or little sins.
---Rhonda on 8/26/09

Lee, what does any of that have to do with your decision to discount the plain, straightforward words of Christ?
---ralph7477 on 8/25/09

ralph -**You may call yourself a Bible student but when you start substituting "Lee's doctrine" in place of Christ's doctrine, ...

And that is one thing we all need to guard against.

One way to do that is to study the different subjects under different authors, and to have fellowship with those who truly know and practice the Word of God.

Interesting that even Paul checked back in with the Jerusalem headquarters with the other Apostles to see if what he was teaching was correct.

Ga 2:2 I went up because of a revelation and set before them (though privately before those who seemed influential) the gospel that I proclaim among the Gentiles, in order to make sure I was not running or had not run in vain.
---lee on 8/25/09

Lee, the argument against your ideas is the scripture itself. Why wouldn't you simply take the scripture as written at face value?

It's got nothing to do with "accepting beliefs that have been handed to us". It is simply reading the word and accepting what it says. But hey, you can believe whatever you want.

You may call yourself a Bible student but when you start substituting "Lee's doctrine" in place of Christ's doctrine, your studies are kind of a waste of time aren't they?
---ralph7477 on 8/25/09

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ralph - what argument of scripture do you have to disprove that Christ was looking at intend only? Luke 16:18

Frankly, I really do not know but simply wonder as we can all agree that all too often people divorce their legitimate spouses in order to marry someone else.

And that is clearly what people did during the time of Christ, as they also do today.

As a Bible student, I try to look at scripture at all different angles instead of accepting beliefs that have been handed to us without questioning.

Bear in mind that Christians used to believe the world was flat and that the sun was not the center of our universe and that based upon their interpretaion of scripture.
---lee on 8/24/09

"I have often wondered if what Christ really stated is if someone divorces his wife with the intent of marrying another commits adultery."-Lee

Gee, that's a handy way to discount what Christ taught if we happen not to like what He taught. Just tell yourself that he "really" said something else and the Bible writers just got it wrong. I wonder how many other statements of Jesus are recorded incorrectly.

Maybe when He said, "It is finished", he really stated something totally different and it isn't finished after all. Boy, that would really put a monkey wrench in the works.
---ralph7477 on 8/24/09

obewan Lk. 16:18 Everyone who divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery, and he who marries a woman divorced from her husband commits adultery.

I have often wondered if what Christ really stated is if someone divorces his wife with the intent of marrying another commits adultery.

While sexual infidelity is all too often the grounds for divorce, there are those that simply decide they no longer desire to be married and leave the wife and children. I seen that in my own church and the elders removed him from the membership - something rarely done in the church today.

I believe the Lord has given some authority to His church to decide these cases. At least, that seems to be the historical precedence.
---Lee on 8/24/09

While there is virtually nothing in the Scripture that forbids re-marriage, we need to take our marriage vows very seriously. Howbeit, there are situations we have no control over and all too often are victimized by a spouses' unfaithfulness.
---Lee on 8/22/09

I hope you meant to say in the case of fornication or adultery, because Luke 16:18 is pretty literal about forbidding divorce and remarriage. I could just as easily extrapolate a statement that says there is virtually nothing in scripture that permits divorce and remarriage.

Luke 16:18"Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and the man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery."
---obewan on 8/24/09

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Dell - **1 Cor. 7:10 ... Let not the wife depart from her husband: But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife.

I interpret the passage to mean believers should not divorce their spouses in the case one does not believe in Christ.

In the following verses if the unbeliever is pleased to dwell with the believing spouse, there should not be a divorce BUT if the unbeliever depart, the believer is not under any obligation to the departed unbeliever.

I wonder if the Lord causes a divorce to occur in order that the believer may no longer be in bondage but become free to be fruitful. An unbeliever may be a genuine servant of evil.see 2 Cor. 6:14
---Lee on 8/23/09

Dell, the objective of Romans 7:1 is to illustrate one can be released from the law upon the death of the spouse.

The passage illustrates believers 'also have died to the law through the body of Christ, so that you may belong to another, to him who has been raised from the dead, in order that we may bear fruit for God'.

The passage is not directed towards denial of re-marriage of those divorced, but towards our belonging to Christ through His death. Christ became the end of the law of righteousness for those who believe. Rom. 10:4

Divorce, thro we truly hate it for its effects, is recognized in the Bible under certain conditions such as sexual unfaithfulness.

I rejoice my marriage has lasted over 30 years.
---Lee on 8/23/09

regarding to the statement below... though i've made a statement like this.. cant be taken too dogmatically because... I would not be a judge of what unforgivable is or not... because seems to be a darkening fact on what i said..

Regardless .. of what is to be said.. we need to trust in the Lord Jesus Christ.. He is our Savior and we need to bring our case and problems to the Lord...

The lord says we are not to judge one another but to Love one another...

Praise our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ...
---john_camping on 8/23/09

unforgibable sin - the Holy Spirit is going to convict you in your life. If there is no true repentance you could possibly get in a state where you will resist the Spirit of God in your life. This would be unforgivable. We come to the Lord as sinners in repentence we must remember the Grace of our Lord Jesus. We are the Lost fold and he wants us all to return. Let us look at our faults and not the others regardless the sin that was done to you. We need to trust the Lord for a saving faith and pray for one another for the faithful believers in the body of christ especially and for those who are lost. We are lost if we continue sinning we need to evaluate our faith and ask for a faith that will save. Amen
---john_camping on 8/23/09

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All Christians bible oriented or not must follow the commands and teachings of the bible or the are not followers of Christ.

Lee, What's your understanding of Romans 7:1 and 1Cor. 7:10-11 apart from what Christ said in Matthew 19:9

If we cannot respect the teachings or instructions of Christ, whose followers are we?

A repentant Christian is a Christian who stops a particular sin and begins to live right before the Lord.
One cannot be repentant while keeping the stollen property. The above passages say any man who marries a divorced woman is committing adultery as long as he has the woman, unless the husband is dead. In God's eyes, there are no ex-husbands. God knows no divorce.
---Dell on 8/22/09

We are fortunate that most Bible oriented churches believe in forgiveness of past sins and in restoration.

While there is virtually nothing in the Scripture that forbids re-marriage, we need to take our marriage vows very seriously. Howbeit, there are situations we have no control over and all too often are victimized by a spouses' unfaithfulness.

If you find yourself in a church that discriminates against repentant Christian, I suggest finding a more Biblically oriented church.
---Lee on 8/22/09

and this brings you (and all of RELIGIOUS christianity)(sic) to most of THEIR misunderstandings when using one verse out of context to support a tradition of man without taking in the ENTIRE message
---Rhonda on 8/20/09

Who says I have a misunderstanding, and who says I disagree with your view?

I am trying to point out that more than one view can be supported with scripture.

No verse LITERALLY says that divorced people can remarry. It can only be EXTRAPOLATED that it is not forbidden. There ARE verses that say LITERALLY (with no conditions) that it is adultery. I am not trying to be mean or start cults. Trust me. I am unmarried in my 40s, and 97% of the available single women at church are divorced.
---obewan on 8/21/09

and to understand Matt 19:9 it helps if you READ the entire chapter LEST you forget Matt 19:6,11

and this brings you (and all of RELIGIOUS christianity) to most of THEIR misunderstandings when using one verse out of context to support a tradition of man without taking in the ENTIRE message
---Rhonda on 8/20/09

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Obewan 1Corin 7 is very clear ...NOT ALL marriages are bound by God should give it a read
---Rhonda on 8/17/09

Again, if I understand it, it only allows for divorce. Not bound means the believer does not have to live with an unbeliever. I see only silence on the remarriage part.

Matt 19:9 is a better passage for your argument, but even it only implies it is not a sin for the MAN. The second part says quite literally that whosoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery. It might seem unfair, but it was written to a patriarchal society where men could have more than one wife but not vice versa.
---obewan on 8/17/09

Obewan 1Corin 7 is very clear ...NOT ALL marriages are bound by God should give it a read
---Rhonda on 8/17/09

remarriage is not a sin after divorce if divorced a spouse who was unfaithful

Where is your quote of supporting scripture?

My read of all the scriptures suggests that that position is an OPINION, just like it is an OPINION that divorced people may not remarry.

Scriptures on unfaithful spouses only say divorce is permitted. No scripture anywhere that says remarriage is permitted. It is an extrapolation people make when they cry out with their God is unfair mantra.

The argument could also be made that God is "unfair" for sending people who have never heard the Gospel to Hell. Since God is in charge, I would rather err on the "safe" side and avoid marriage to a divorced woman.
---obewan on 8/17/09


through unbelief we tie ourselves up in a load of stuff that God didn't orchestrate so the best advice anyone can give you be real to yourself the scriptures say that remarriage is not permitted for the woman, why? that's just how God planned it. If you find that your husband was unfaithful and left or the other way around neither of you can remarry.

If you were unfaithful and your husband was not then if you have the Faith that it takes the bible:1 Coritnhians 7 states you are to remain unmarried.

My thoughts concluding suggests that God will take care of you but again you need to read and learn how and why for yourself it is no use me telling you, you have to do your own homework through the Gospels.
---Carla3939 on 6/29/09

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What can I say, have just come on here to ask the exact same question !
My heart and every fibre of my being tells me its right but 'words' tell me I'm wrong. . .
Please someone answer us both as soon as possible. . .
---Jan on 6/27/09


Your pastor is a rare one, those are the answers closest to the actual truth especially when his belief is that she is an adulterer married to a man that has a wife still living.
---Carla3939 on 5/24/09

I have a good friend who was married to a man for nine years.Eight years into the marriage she found out that he had been married to a woman before her for four months.The woman decided she had made a mistake getting married and wanted out.The man tried to save the marriage but she did not want it and went and got an anullment.My friend went and talked to her pastor about it and he said she was living in adultery and she would have to divorce him to make it right with God.So she divorced him.I am wondering if her pastor told her the right thing to do because it says in Malachi that God hates divorce.
---john on 5/23/09

''Anyone is not saying re-marriage is a Sin'' Christ said it: Paraphrased :If a man divorces his wife except for fornication he causes his wife if she marries again to commit Adultery.

Matt 19:9 cannot be twisted to mean both men and women, 1 Cor 7 A woman is to remain single or reconcile

If you don't understand scripture leave advice to the relevant scriptures and post them that way your opinion is kept to yourself and Gods word is delivered.
---Carla3939 on 5/16/09

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especially if you are young you will want to remarry,and the bible allows for that, but some churches look down on people who are divorced, in fact there are some pastors who do not marry divorcee,and some churches do not allow them to take any office in church, but whats amazing, is that the same church will allow someone who has brutally killed four people, to give their testamony,on the pulpit,
remarry, you may have to, but how soon after a divorce is critical,and to whom?
some people marry as soon as possible, and that is not so good, some people look for someone that looks like the person that left them. some people marry to prove a point to their ex. all these are the wrong reason to remarry
---mikey on 5/15/09

Trav ... Sorry I had imagined you had been talking about a marriage between one person and another, which is what this blog is all about
---alan8566_of_UK on 5/13/09

Don't apologize please. YAHSHUA was a person and GOD as well.
This blog is a forum. The only reason it is here is because GOD extended mercy to his divorced wife. Sacrificing and dying so he could free her for remarriage.
So its applicable.
You asked the question who did GOD marry. Projecting that you couldn't/wouldn't look/see/consider....others will. Thanks for asking anyway.
---Trav on 5/13/09
---Trav on 5/15/09

I'm not talking magazines or tv, Obewan. I'm referring to every day life concerning women and pictures of women in the neighborhood that my EX viewed at his place of work. Lust is lust,,whether it's magazines, tvs or actions. And, when it destroys your mate inside it's sin no matter how you look at it. This is only a drop in the bucket as to the emotional destruction he created in my life because of his lusting. It's up to the individual as to how they handle the situation. A man is supposed to PROTECT his wife and do everything and anything to make sure she KNOWS she is his love for life. He will always be responsible for making me feel as though men can never be trusted.
---kandee on 5/14/09

You are free to divorce an unfaithful spouse...that involves both a spouse who lusts in his heart...

Does that leave room for forgiveness? When Jesus addressed adultery of the heart he was making the point that we have all done it at one time or another. He was not making yet another condition for divorce. It was similar to his "let him who is without sin cast the first stone" teaching.

I would never divorce a wife who had lusted for a movie star or soap opera hunk. I would forgive her and work harder to rebuild our relationship.

This problem is rampant in the church and more forgiveness and less divorce is the solution. See the movie "Fireproof" for a good example.
---obewan on 5/4/09

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You are free to divorce an unfaithful spouse. To me that involves both a spouse who lusts in his heart for other women or physically acts out his thoughts. God's word clearly states that lusting is committing adultery if two people are married. Some people would not agree saying that only the sexual acts is adultery. If that is the case then why is it so mentally abusive to the other spouse? I do not feel you are damned if you remarry. I am a Christian woman who learned to "dislike" my ex husband because of the horrible mental abuse he put me through when it came to other women. I remarried a Christian spouse and depend on God to keep our marriage holy until the end.
---kandee on 5/2/09

I would like to know what most people on here consider an unfaithful spouse...when it comes to adultery do most of you think in terms of the physical or sexual act between two people outside of their marriage or lusting in the heart.
I think it would be a distortion of scripture to use lust to justify a divorce. I draw the distinction between "virtual adultery" and "literal adultery" myself. I mean, should I divorce a wife who reads trashy romance novels? Then we have the scripture about gouging out eyeballs...should we take it "literally"?
---obewan on 4/30/09

I would like to know what most people on here consider an unfaithful spouse...when it comes to adultery do most of you think in terms of the physical or sexual act between two people outside of their marriage or lusting in the heart. God makes it clear that lusting is just as sinful as actually committing the act. Either way it is very plain both are unfaithfulness and are considered adultery. They both defile marriage.
---kandee on 4/30/09

Divorce is not a sin when divorcing an unfaithful spouse

if your spouse was unfaithful God does not expect you to continue to live an unfaithful spouse who has BROKEN the marriage contract ...only churches that practice fear based sermons tell their flock ALL divorce is a sin ...that is lie to Gods Word

Gods Word tells us there is no sin in divorcing an unfaithful spouse

remarriage is not a sin after divorce if divorced a spouse who was unfaithful
---Rhonda on 10/7/08

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Everybody says that divorce is a sin ??

Divorce is not a sin ( in it self )

The sin is the hardness of heart that is the sin, I am divorcing my husband, we have been together for 13 years, and it has been hell from day 1, he has never been faithfull and has maintained a very serious love affiar the whole time, he is ungodly, to the point of being evil, physically abusive to both me and our children, my children hate him and they hate the idea of marriage because of what they have seen, my children are strong belivers. i love my husband as a person, and i have been faithful to the cause of staying married,but jesus came to set us free, in fact he died that we should live in peace.
i proberbly could stay and enjure more shame
---corinne on 10/7/08

Jeremiah 3:8 God himself divorced Israel. Yes God is divorced because Israel committed spiritual audultry. Israel was Gods chosen people. It was nescesary to divorce Israel so that we might be included in his plan. Now salvation is for the jew and the gentile. Jesus is coming back one day for his bride (the church) and we will eat at the marriage supper of the lamb. In short not only is God divorced but he's going to remarry and the wedding day is set.
---Marc on 5/8/07

The liberty we enjoy as Christians is not a licentious [disregarding the laws of morality, in sexual matters or no kind of matters] liberty. Even though Christ has redeemed us from the curse of the law, yet He has NOT freed us from the OBLIGATION of IT. >>>That all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this, "Thou Shalt Love Thy Neighbor As Thyself, Love Is The Sum Of The Whole Law." Have A Good Day!+++
---catherine on 4/25/07

I do not know if you are damned or not. I do know that those who follow Christ, follow His instructions, even when they are not convenient or fun.

Jesus did not allow for remarriage after divorce, and only allowed divorce after fornication, which is not the same as adultery. Put your trust in Jesus and seek help and guidance from your faith community. Check also if your marriage was truly covenental.
---lorra8574 on 4/24/07

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Pay no attention to these people.Gal. 5 It says trying to be saved by obeying the law (circumcision) have fallen from grace and Christ has no value for them. And that is what it means when they say if you do something against the Bible teaching then your damned. Besides the fact that if your husband had an affair according to the Bible your free to leave. So just go on loving them and pray that they will come to knowledge of the truth.God Bless you, keep studying, wash your mind and feed your spirit.
---Adam on 4/24/07

I was married for eight months the first time and my ex husband left me for another woman and had a child with her. I was single for 13 years and found my second husband that I know that the Lord sent him to me for he is the best thing that has ever happend to me. There is only unforgiveable sin an that is blasphemy against the Holy Ghost
---robin5899 on 4/24/07

No it is not a sin to remarry. Sin comes in here: if you marry an unsaved man and you profess to be a christian woman. We should be equally yoked according to the word of God. Jesus should be the third party in our marriage and we have a better chance to have a true marriage made in heaven. Not beginning with someone who does not love the Lord. It is doomed from the start.
---robyn on 4/23/07

Divorce is forgiven and no your not damned to hell. Don't let anyone tell you different.
---Rebecca_D on 4/23/07

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Cheryl. If your husband was unfaithful you had the right to divorce him. He broke his vow to you and brought defilement into your home. It would have been best if he would have repented and you both would have worked through it but you have the right to divorce in the case of a fornicating spouse. If you have asked God to forgive any part you would have had in it I'm sure He has. Read Matt. 12:31
---john on 4/23/07

Remarriage is not unforgivable. I would suggest that you seek therapy for yourself to help you sort out what you may have contributed, both positive and negative, to your marriage. This can help you learn more about yourself, so that your next potential marriage might be better.
---Madison1101 on 4/23/07

Divorce and remarriage is not an unforgivable sin. There is only one unforgivable sin--blasphemy of the Holy Spirit. Too many people condemn divorced people when God can forgive divorce and use divorced and remarried people to spread HIS gospel.
---Susie on 4/23/07

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