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Wasting Money On Poor

I am praying for my husband who is not a believer..He would be a believer today if not for my father inlaw who discourages him from coming to church and in his own words: THEY WILL CONVERT YOU..what would one do in this circumstance? He constantly tells me we are wasting money on the poor.

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 ---jana on 5/28/07
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Just keep praying for him. Call on sisters in the Lord to pray for him. Be a loving witness of a wife sold out for Christ. Get involved in a Women's Bible study and start reflecting the Word to your husband in your manner and life.
---Madison1101 on 7/1/08

In addition to your praying for him to come to Christ you might ask him what is it about the greatest story ever told he rejects? What does he find difficult to accept about God and his deep love for us? What are his beliefs about life after death? Do this with love and concern to get him to open up to you
& let him know you are praying for him. AS far as helping the poor...we are blessed to be a blessing!!
---DEB on 7/21/07

What is your husband's definition of "waste"? Mine is not putting your time and/or resources to better use? What better use is there than preventing suffering?
Why doesn't your husband's family (father and son) believe? May be finding the cause may help you find practical ways to solve the problem.
---Chess_Thinker on 6/26/07

1 Cor 7:14 the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, & the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean.. See Acts 16:31.

God will save your husband because of your faith.

Gal 5:17 For the flesh lusteth against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh: and these are contrary the one to the other: so that ye cannot do the things that ye would.

He won't understand about the tithe, offerings & charity until he is saved.
---a_servant on 6/26/07

Jana, I think it is great that your husband is supportive about your involvement in church. There are women married to unbelievers who do not get that. All I can say is for you to keep following God, being submissive to your husband and keep praying for him. Only God can change someone's heart!
---maryj9396 on 6/22/07

jana,many secular.and alas even christians won,t put one red cent into the kingdom.pray continually for your in laws, and husband.
---tom2 on 5/30/07

thanks so much all for your helpful husband never ever come in between my being involved in anything of church..he is always encouraging me and pays me 2go away 2women's ministry retreats etc without a murmur..I in return just love him back and never ever force him 2come 2church..although sometimes he comes n enjoy the company of all..he loves hosting our university students tht attend church, from all over the world now and again.Am so comforted by all your posts..thanks so much
---jana on 5/30/07

emcee:I love my ma inlaw very much and get on like mum n daughter..we have 4 adult sons all married, 2 are in church, other 2 not.Pa inlaw thinks we cant change people from one culture 2another as is happening in australia n question 2him is "what would u do" No answer there. Dosent believe in giving
---jana on 5/30/07

thank you Jack you are right about Juda..a parallel to some today such as my inlaw..I love all my inlaws, infact none of them believe in God yet get along great. Some joke now n again about my belief however, they respect me very much for what I believe in.Note taken anthony and thanks Carla,never will I give my Lord up ever. Hes my First Love 4Ever..
---jana on 5/30/07

Emcee: Your advice to the blogger is not in keeping with scripture. To tell a wife that her husband needs to be "read the riot act" is totally in conflict with what the Bible says about being submissive and having a gentle and quiet spirit.
---Madison1101 on 5/29/07

Emcee: Your advice to the blogger is not in keeping with scripture. To tell a wife that her husband needs to be "read the riot act" is totally in conflict with what the Bible says about being submissive and having a gentle and quiet spirit.
---Madison1101 on 5/29/07

Jana::Yours is not a religious or Non believers problem Its a control Problem.Your Husband is NOT a man & cannot run his own household & runs to Dad. Does Dad control the purse strings.Dad's days are out & over in your domain since your Husband cannot take responsibility you have to introduce a new set of rules. Hubby needs to be read the riot act "Cease & desist" I know I sound harsh,but action is what is needed. You do not mention Children Or even a ma- in- law.God be with you .
---Emcee on 5/29/07

** Jack, instead of criticizing her husband and father-in-law, answer her question.**

If you will read carefully, you'll see I'm not criticing her FIL or husband.
---Jack on 5/29/07

I can't answer your question,Jana other than by your example of a gental and quite spirit. My question to you is though, has he ever explained what he means about how one can waist money on the poor? I can understand about wasting money by giving to rich ministries but not about giving to the poor. He loses me there. I will pray for his salvation.Blessings to you.
---jody on 5/29/07

Jack, instead of criticizing her husband and father-in-law, answer her question. Jana, there are 2 things you can do. PRAY, and be the best witness you can be. A lot of nonbelieving spouses are won over by the believer's actions. Jesus said you and your household will be saved. Trust that and God to perform His Word.
---betty8468 on 5/29/07

My friend's husband was just that way for years--cranky! He got saved at the age of 74 after she prayed for him for 50 years! There is hope!!!
---Susie on 5/28/07

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My heart goes out to you. You are living in Hell on earth. How do I know? You are married to an unbeliever. He will always look upon you as a fool when you try to help the poor or do anything that Christians are suppose to do. Why should he feel differently? He has no love for Christ and most certainly no compassion for the poor and unfortunates. God bless you. Continue to do good. God will take care of you. You are in a very hard spot.
---Robyn on 5/28/07

Also, ask your father-in-law if he would accept money from a church if his house and everything he owned was destroyed in a natural disaster? I think if had ever been poor in his life he would not be so irratated by poor people. Maybe that is something he will have to learn the hard way...
---Anthony on 5/28/07

That's an excuse sorry to sound blunt I don't mean to! But It is all to a familiar story blaming others. You see if a man want's to serve No one and nothing will stand in his way. Every one has a choice and until he see's the need to find God, all you can do is pray and you know what leave it there. It can burden you in such a way, you become a hindrance to him. I share your sorrow thou! I pray that he finds the Lord, so that your walk will increase God Bless CarlaX
---Carla5754 on 5/28/07

I have found out that while I may be a good witness toward others, I may not be that person to win them over to Christ. There are some people that people has tried their best to win to the Lord, but somehow couldn't. I talked to them once, and they give their heart to Jesus. It may not be you that can win your husband over. Pray mostly for your father-n-law for his eyes to be opened as well.
---Rebecca_D on 5/28/07

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Rent him "A Christmas Carol" based on Charles Dickens' short story. Then ask what he thinks should be done with the poor?

You indicated that he is not a believer. Do you mean an atheist, a non-Christian, an agnostic, or some group of Christian that you do not associate with believing? Prayer helps and a good example. Do not attempt to force your husband to attend church. Just try to encourage him not to interfere with your practice of your faith.
---lorra8574 on 5/28/07

**He constantly tells me we are wasting money on the poor.**

A curious attitude. Judas complained about wasting money on Jesus instead of providing for the poor (not that he really cared about them).

Since he knows so much about what your church does with its money, what does he propose should be done with the money instead? Anything definite?
---Jack on 5/28/07

Prayer is the key that unlock and changes every thing. Keep on praying for your husband. Have that quiet spirit of trusting in God. God has His ways how to convince him of the contrary.
---Elianne on 5/28/07

Seeing he is not a believer he may not have a heart for the poor. If your husband isn't in agreement with that sort of giving why not consult him in what kind of giving he would be interested in and go that direction instead of offending him by what he calls "wasting it?"
---john on 5/28/07

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I have found over the years of ministry that churches need to be very careful when one is a believer and the other isn't. The church should do it's utmost to not cause friction in the home by a now "Godly" spouse. The believer needs to keep a very compassionate, forgiving, non judgemental attitude or else there will be a very large wall built up which drives them further away. The meek and humble spirit is what is needed to win unbelieving spouses.
---john on 5/28/07

**He would be a believer today if not for my father inlaw who discourages him from coming to church and in his own words: THEY WILL CONVERT YOU**

Your father-in-law's advice is probably an excuse, and not a reason, why your husband doesn't believe.
---Jack on 5/28/07

Jana: only God can change someone's heart. the biggest mistake people make is try to force our beliefs on another. we present one way and then do the opposite. that is sending out a bright red flare for all to see. they think, why. if you love Jesus, why disobey his words. people are not stupid and know more than we give them credit for. it may take a lifetime with us living as an example of the Savior in all ways, before someone finally decides to follow Jesus Christ in their life. patience is a virtue.
---ashley on 5/28/07

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