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What Cliques In Church Wrong

What do you think about "cliques" in the Church?

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 ---Cynthia on 8/15/07
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// It's only when these subgroups are at odds with each other that there are problems.//
Cliques or caucuses are normally or naturally formed among any large group, it can also be intentionally formed based on common ideas.
Formation of cliques / caucuses is unavoidable in any sizable group.
In the church: It is only when 1 (or more) clique is not focused on Christ and it uses its energy to pursue ungodly schemes that problems are created.
---Adetunji on 7/26/14

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---Lidia4796 on 10/30/13

In any large identifiable group of people, there will be subgroups based on more immediate friendships and acquaintances. This includes the typical congregation.

It's only when these subgroups are at odds with each other that there are problems.

Glory to Jesus Christ!
---Cluny on 10/14/13

Alice, I feel for you. Life is too short to go on feeling unappreciated and unwanted. Don't waste your life in places where people make you feel like that. You and your kids deserve to feel wanted and important and to have real friends. Please get yourself into a body of believers that treats you like equals and like you matter to them. You will probably face a strong guilt trip from your current church, but they are not God and no true pastor would ignore certain members of their church. A pastors job is more than just preaching, part of their job is to visit and shephard thier flock outside of the church setting.
---Jed on 10/14/13

Until I saw my two answers to this question - below - I did not realise that I have been using Christianet (on and off) for more than 6 years. I used to visit here now and then in those days but my, how the years have flown.

I attend a different church these days and was made so very welcome from day one. I wake up feeling glad when it's Sunday whereas I found the day quite an ordeal at one time because of the cliques in a previous church. I'm now actively involved in 2 midweek meetings also. Always felt like an outcast when I turned up at such meetings in previous churches.
---Rita_H on 10/14/13

I attend a small church. 5 families and sometimes one visiting family. 3 out of 5 are very cliquish. It is the pastors family and their best friends (who used to be a pastor) and their extended family. I used to live in between them about a block (or less)from each sandwiched in between these two pastor families. The mothers and their children would walk past my house almost every day for about 3 years to visit each other until we moved to the other side of town. My children who are their childrens ages would look out the window longingly and ask, "Why don't they visit us?" Not once did they stop and visit just to be friendly. We did some, but it was not reciprocated. I want to leave. Is this wrong?
---alice on 10/14/13

And Jesus knew their thoughts, and said unto them, Every kingdom divided against itself is brought to desolation, and every city or house divided against itself shall not stand:...

You can say the same for cliques within the church.
---Steveng on 6/14/11

People are such creatures of habit. The way they sit in church pews is just one example.

Cliques are just as normal. Anthropologist Robin Dunbar
says the maximum number of persons the human brain can recognize, follow, and relate to personally is about 150. But to share personal information and maintain a day to day,person-to-person relationship, the number is much smaller. Only a few can be "close" friends.

A clique is comfortable, but as Christians we need to notice and reach out to those outside our own circles. Psa 82:3 Defend the poor and fatherless: do justice to the afflicted and needy.(those outside cliques.)
---Donna66 on 6/14/11

Cliques or different groups are needed so that people can pour into others. For example Jesus had many cliques. The 12 disciples were one clique. Peter, James, and John were a clique, The large group of people that wanted to hear about the kingdom not just see miracles was another group. Having different levels of cliques allowed Jesus to pour into them at the correct level of wisdom. Because we are NOT perfect we need to be more inclusive than exclusive so we do not limit wisdom between believers.
---Scott on 6/13/11

Those so-call' "clicks" n the Church.. Yeah, I 've been hurt both physically & verbally by those type of folks! I thank God! They did not disway Me from loving God n let'n Jesus word kept me from treating them the way they treated me... I am thankfull now the God answered my prayers! a Miraclecame my way... The Lord moved ! I have a wonderfull church & they admonish & love the poor n rich,handicapped or who ever they welcome you with open arms! There is an abundance encouragement at my "home" of worship! Agape love we have a wonderfull pastor and asst.Pastor and we all help out! No Big U's n Little Me's! Just sinners saved by the Blood of Jesus! Thankyou Lord!
---ELENA on 6/12/11

I think exclusinve groups are wrong in theory. However, I do understand that people have close friends, and then not so close friends. People should be loving and accepting of everyone for social events involving the church. However, I see nothing wrong with a family inviting another family over for dinner and fellowship to the exclusion of other church familiies.
---Trish9863 on 8/19/08

Hi, since I'm almost deaf, I always try to go for the front row, even if I'm at a different church, so I can read lips, most people, thankfully, have been very kind to me. :)
---Mary on 8/18/07

In the church I attend the majority sit in the same seat every week, including me but I have never heard anyone say to anyone else that this is so and so's seat, nor should they. If someone who is new or someone who attends infrequently arrives before I do and takes the seat I would normally occupy I just go and sit in another. I have twice been asked to move when I have visited other churches. I did so, but did not feel that it was right for them to ask me.
---RitaH on 8/17/07

I have had two experiences with cliques. In a big church there was a clique of my own peers and they didn't really care for me because my family wasn't rich and plus my dad was the janitor of the church. That was a big experience. My other one was in a small church and I was really accepted there. Everyone showed they cared and rich and poor wasn't a issue there. I don't go to church now but if I ever do I want my second experience to be the kind of church that I would want.
---Charlene on 8/16/07

I've not experienced this - I purposely move around every few months so I get more familiar with people and when I know other people sit in the same place - I don't.
---Andrea on 8/16/07

I've not experienced this - I purposely move around every few months so I get more familiar with people and when I know other people sit in the same place - I don't.
---Andrea on 8/16/07

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No church whatsoever should have any cliques at any time. It I went to this one church for about 20 years and they had (still do) cliques and it offended many people (including me). RitaH, Yes I've had that happen to me before. I said okay, and asked where could I sit that doesn't have assigned name? At my church, non-members would come in or group singers and would take my and my husband's seat. I never said nothing. I didn't care, just as long I could hear the word of God, I can sit in the floor.
---Rebecca_D on 8/16/07

Yes Rita I have, so how did I react? I moved to another seat. I believe that "cliques" hurt the body of Christ, so therefore I stay away from them.
---Cynthia on 8/16/07

Have any of you visited a church and been told that the seat you have taken is someone else's seat? How did you react if this happened to you? If it hasn't happened how do you think you would react if it did?
---RitaH on 8/16/07

I feel cliques are wrong but have been around since the beginning of time. They won't go away, even in the churches. Its not the cliques themselves that are so wrong. It is what they do inside of the cliques. Right is going to win over wrong. I don't bother with them unless they are for right. God hates division and impartiality. Most cliques are divisive. Steer clear of them.
---Robyn on 8/16/07

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Some really great answers to this question. And I virtually agree with them all.
---Mima on 8/16/07

Wherever you find people, you find cliques. It starts in childhood, peer groups, popular kids, geeks, gangs, etc.
A group for every interest. Intellectuals, athletes, part of our social culture.
Animals are social creatures, too. They form cliques, have a pecking order. Ever been around horses? They'll all gang up on the smaller, younger, newer horse. He has to eat last, after all the others are done.
Animals can be mean, people can be. I don't think this will end, anytime soon.
---Marylois on 8/15/07

More about the animal kingdom, nature weeds out genetic defects this way. You have a sick, injured animal, the rest of the pack, herd will leave it to die.
People are supposed to be more evolved, but children/adults sometimes shun shy, quiet types. The squeeky wheels often get the grease. It's not fair, and it's not nice. It's fleshy and worldly. The Church should behave differently.
---Marylois on 8/15/07

In churches, you have those who always demand their seat up front, get out of my chair/parking place... You have the gossips who pretend the prayer line is where you let it all hang out, then pray after you've raked everyone over the coals. You have the tithers that hold power over the pastor, run the church, or they'll withdraw tithes for the utility bills. Cynthia, cliques take all forms, endeavor to keep yourself free of them, if you can.
---Marylois on 8/15/07

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I believe they can be both healthy and damaging. If the Church has a large membership then I would take it to be positive (Prayer Warriors, Youths, Singles etc.) They can be damaging if the clique is discriminating based on personal biases and showing favoritism. I believe there are cliques in every church being that it is a Spiritual Hospital.
---Marcia on 8/15/07

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