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I Cheated On My Wife

I cheated on my wife one time and the secret killed me, so I told her everything. I love my wife with all of my being and it kills me that I hurt her. She wants a divorce and can not loose my family. How can I get through to my wife. I am sorry and I will never jepordize our marriage again. Help.

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 ---L.J. on 9/22/07
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L.J. I'm so sorry to hear of what you have done. Telling your wife is one thing, confessing is another, now comes the consequences. No one knows how deep they will be. Consequences many times turn out very, very bad. That is the thing about sin, no one knows how they will turn out. I feel for your wife and family, they are the victim's. You cannot make someone love you or forgive you, or make someone see what you see. Here is where your dependence on God will really be tested.
---Mark_V. on 10/3/07

#2. My prayers are for you and family, and that in the end, it will give glory to God. Do what you can to make the marriage work, that and prayer is all you can do. Your wife, has her own relationship with God and she will do what she thinks is right, but whatever she does, it will be up to her. Beg if you have to, but give it your best. No one changes in a minute or a day, many times this things take time to heal.
---Mark_V. on 10/3/07

L.J Know that if you have wholeheartedly confessed this fault to the Lord (1John 1:9), then He has forgiven you. Now, you need to pray for your wife's healing. She has been wounded. We know the Lord always leads us to forgive. she has a choice of marriage or divorce, but the Lord always sees reconciliation as the best choice and He will guide her this way. Pray that she will receive the Lord's direction, and let the Lord cleanse you from the thing that caused you to fall and cause her hurt.
---Delora on 10/3/07

Pray and ask God what his will is. You have to realize that that you made a mistake, and every action has a reaction, you actions may has cost you your wife and kids. I am praying for you.
---Bennie on 9/29/07

No sir you don't love your wife with all your heart are you would never have cheated on her you are lying to your self and your wife She loves you and she has proved it by being true to you And you you have no excuse for what you did.
---Betty2 on 9/25/07

Pray to God for wisdom, but it is a good idea that you told her. The bible says it is good to be reconciled to your wife whom you have devorced, so please try by all means to persuade her that you are not going to do it again and always be faithful and trust God it will work because nothing is impossibe for God. Amen
---Peter_Mafohla on 9/24/07

It killed you ... twice?
---alan_of_UK on 9/24/07

Elder Maria said: "Prayer, start spending time in prayer together."

Not sure if she would want to pray with him. Best thing to do under such circumstance is to seek professional help - find a good councillor and see what s/he can do to straighten out the situation.
---Caring on 9/23/07

LJ, did you confess and repent to God who is faithful to forgive us? That is the first thing that you should do. Telling your wife was the right thing to do, but if she chooses to forgive you is her choice. I pray that she does and I agree that your wife and you should seek good Godly marriage counceling if she is willing to do that. I will keep your family in my prayers. God Bless and I hope your marriage will be saved.
---Cynthia on 9/22/07

Begin by telling your wife that you'd like to have marital counseling from your pastor or other. It already sounds like your ready to heal from this incident. I will pray for restoration in your marriage because it is the enemy that comes to kill, steal and destroy. (especially in christian marriages today). God Bless you and your wife!
---Monica on 9/22/07

"Confessing" to your spouse was not the loving thing to do. What purpose was it supposed to have served? Ease your guilty conscience? It certainly wasn't for her benefit. Love doesn't hurt.
You say you love your wife, yet you put this hurt upon her because it was killing you. It was your sin, you should have bore the consequences. I guess you will but now so will she and all of your family.
I hope others can learn from your mistake.
---robin8683 on 9/22/07

First you did it - then you thought you could relieve your conscience by confessing. So now your wife needs to do what she needs to do.
If you've been a decent husband other then this you will probably be fine - otherwise good riddance.
---Andrea on 9/22/07

At least u told her the true, and I know it is hurting u, and all I can say is turn it over to God and maybe go to ur pastor for surport to help u and your wife, but it may or may not be to late for u and if it is at least you were up front about it and she heard it from you and not somebody else. I will pray for u and ur family.
---ANN on 9/22/07

Prayer, start spending time in prayer together. Read the Word of God(BIBLE)on the subjects of Marriage, forgiveness,Reconsilation.
Be very open and honest with her about "WHY" you went to another person. This process is very painful and YES, she will cry and be angry, but it will allow both of you to work on that area of your marriage. Please stop
looking outside of the marriage to others.
Give er time to heal, and shower her with the love
---Elder_Marla_Daniel on 9/22/07

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