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Does God Pick Your Mate

Does anyone believe that God can pick your mate without picking one for yourself? Does anyone wish they would have waited on God and not picked your own?

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 ---Rebekah on 10/29/07
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Psalms 127:1 Except the Lord build the house, they labour in vain that build it,... Proverbs3:5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not unto thine own understanding. Isaiah 65:2 I have spread out my hands all the day unto a rebellious people, which walketh...after their own thoughts(AKJV).
---Adetunji on 11/23/11

Ya I do.

I prayed, and prayed, I searched, and looked, for someone. But nada.
So prayed once more, and left it God hands, .......

Beloved. I really think He gave me the guy, no great guy I'm with now. He's awesum, and exceeded my expectations-all I prayed for.
So I'm thankfull, and I'm SOOOOOO glad I didn't pick someone on my own...Bin there done that... and it always ended up horribly.
---jill on 11/22/11

So what is the solution, stay with the lord content yourself in whatever situation you find yourself, get your head outta the[ box ] and realise how
blessed you are either single happy/miserable or married and happy/miserable.

Now for the (BEST PART) chose which you prefer be because not everyone is married and happy and if t you find such a couple in their 40+ ask them exactly how you can indeed marry be blissfully saved and stay happy, with FIRST husband/wife or in the event of a partners death re-married.

All else is deception and if that seems impossible to work out you know why your single( Dont go there!)
---Carla on 9/30/11

//Does anyone believe that God can pick your mate without picking one for yourself?

I believe in answered prayer that if one seeks to be married that often God will provide the opportunity to met and decide for ourselves.

I prayed for and got my wife - a woman I was used to lead to faith in Christ, some 35 years ago.
---lee1538 on 9/29/11

no GOD does not pick your mate

many would choose that LIE believing they have no responsibility in the matter

then if they end up single they can say "it is Gods will" or the "wrong mate" they can blame GOD still

there are no Scriptures that support or imply that one "waits on GOD" who will pick a mate for you - how foolish!

what many SHOULD do - TAKE responsibility COMMUNICATE prior to marriage relate to one another and potential issues ...if morals characters are same etc

LACK of communication and being irresponsible with a life-long commitment that many ignore resulting in PICKING the "wrong mate" the BLAME is entirely on oneself
---Rhonda on 9/29/11

Rebekah, yes, I think that there may be a lot of people who wish they would not have rushed into marriage and waited on the Lord.
---Eloy on 9/28/11

Eloy, here you go again, another false statement. You said,
" Many NonChristians can also discern between the godly and the ungodly."
Nonchristians cannot discern spiritual matters, the godly from the ungodly.
"But the natural man does not receive the things of the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him, "nor can he know them, because they are spiritually discern." ( 1 Cor. 2:14).
So here again you make another statement contrary to the Word of God. Just as you did when you said on the other blog that Believers can leave God when they sin, yet you had said before believers do not sin, and gave yourself as an example, sinless.
---Mark_V. on 9/28/11

ELENA, I reaaly have no care what people's nonBiblical beliefs are. I know whom is saved and whom is not saved simply by the manifested fruits that they bear. You bear antiChristian and antiChrist fruits then clearly you are unsaved and a condemned sinner, but if you bear Christian and Christ fruits then clearly you are saved. Many NonChristians can also discern between the godly and the ungodly.
---Eloy on 9/27/11

After god chooses your mate, what do you do next? like the commercial says 'it is your turn to make the relationship work.'
but christianity condemns relying on your own 'strength'.
---mike on 9/27/11

hello, no disrespect ... I have reach and it's Really strong if not errant bro.Eloy... God forgive me if I am wrong I believe you can not judge and proclaim eh,bro. Mark V. Not saved! We can not judge and say no one not saved! You certainly,disagree or agree... I will never say someone on here not saved. Mark very constant in prayer & teaching on here.. He tries to help people as well,you bro. Eloy you also alot on & yes, thank God for you,also.We have to speak in love. love one another.Thanks!ChristiaNet
---ELENA on 9/27/11

Eloy, coming from you and not God, I believe I am saved. And let me tell you why, because that believe comes by faith not by works. For again God never makes mistakes.
---Mark_V. on 9/27/11

Hola! Guess what? Mark V. I agree best wait on the Lord! I have a friend 'Mexico & I ask prayer always for him.He want a wife. You can't go by feelings! I am convince if God not make confirmation.. Then I always be alone. Even,two believers can make a terrible mistake if, he or she not God's choice .I say walk away 'n wait on God! Most times people do not take time to get to know each other/or someone play'n apart & the real "one"shows up down the years! Bad..
---ELENA on 9/26/11

Nana, I am sorry brother, I was following the custom that, names ending in -a are feminine, as "nina" for a girl, and names ending in -o are masculine, as "nino" for a boy.
---Eloy on 9/26/11


I am your brother not your sister. Take care.
---Nana on 9/26/11

Nana, A-men sister. Not hearers only, but only doers: for faith without works is dead. James 2:26.
---Eloy on 9/26/11

I on the other hand agree 100% with Eloy's comment on 9/24/11!

Ephesians 4:1_3: "I therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you that ye walk worthy of the vocation wherewith ye are called,
With all lowliness and meekness, with longsuffering, forbearing one another in love,
Endeavouring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace."

We must walk the walk and talk the talk. Love God and Love of neighbour at all times. Yesterdays love will not suffice today.
Ezekiel 3:20.
---Nana on 9/26/11

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I completely disagree with MarkV always and at all times, until that time that he repents and becomes saved.
---Eloy on 9/26/11

MarkV, Of course what God does, does not fail, he makes no mistakes. People do have choices, like Adam and Eve, walked with God, and look what happened. Also consider Hosea...Things may "fail" in our eyes, yet still have a purpose
---chria9396 on 9/25/11

I disagree completely with Eloy again. Here is why, because when God does something, it never fails. He is without mistake. Marriages come together for many reasons, some times because of sin. Those don't come from God. They are permitted to happen or allowed, but God never sanction them. Many married before either one was a Christian. Some, even if they were Christian, still married when they were not patient with God and jump at the first opportunity. Some married because the spouse was beautiful and forgot to look inside the person, not outside. Others were mean and their wives left them for another. It is best to wait on the Lord.
---Mark_V. on 9/25/11

Yes. Even if God presented a spouse to you and you marry, there is no guarrantee that the spouse will not fail you, for each day a soul must be married to Christ and not neglect their walk. The key is to be thankful and appreciate your current spouse and to pray together every day.
---Eloy on 9/24/11

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I believe that God has given us free will to make choices.However God doesn't want us to walk blindly and choose blindly.So He has given us guidelines in choosing a mate.We could attributes good qualities to look up for in a man through the man in the bible like Joseph.Joseph is positive minded,responsible,gentle,humble and has good discernment,forgiving,loving and respectful and most specially fears and love the Lord
---mj on 9/23/11

\\The man I've been promised is not ready, he is backslidden and confused.\\

Gloria, has God told the man in question that he's supposed to marry you?

I know a woman who has been unhappy most of her life because every man she met she claimed that God told her he was the man chosen for her.

Somehow, God never got around to telling the men in question that.

Glory to Jesus Christ!
---Cluny on 9/22/11

The Lord can definitely pick a mate for you. Oftentimes, after He reveals this, He may cause you to wait upon Him to see the promise fulfilled. This can be because both or one of you is not ready for the marriage. In my case, He clearly delineated who the man is. The waiting is the hard part. This type of situation is a hard test of faith and trust, and if it is passed successfully, is a major milestone in the Christian experience.
The man I've been promised is not ready, he is backslidden and confused. The waiting is the hardest part, because at some point the promise seems impossible and the circumstances unlikely to produce the desired result. This is where the shield of faith and the sword of the Word come in handy.
---Gloria on 9/21/11

i believe/know God chooses our mates. BUT I also see that it depends on our CHOICES. That is how some can still end in divorce and how so many are missed all together. You must choose to grow together not apart. And commit to it to the very end. To both eachother AND yourself. It can be done....
---Toby on 11/27/07

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God has given us free will which means we choose ourselves and God lets us make out own mistakes. I once had a conversation with my ex mother-in-law about how I wished God had not made me marry her son and she told me that God didnt make me do anything, I chose him, not God, and she was right!! I love her dearly still.
---carol on 11/4/07

The way to keep a marriage together even with problems and discontent is to remain committed to that marriage and not pursue divorce. Accepting your spouse whether he/she was from God or not. It is a growing process where you learn about your faults as well as your spouses.
---Karen on 11/3/07

God likely has a plan for our mates, as he has a plan for our hole lives. The factor is do we follow God plan for us. With a Divorce rate running around 50% we have a lot of individuals who don't listen to God's advice in mate selection and a lot of other areas.
---notlaw99 on 11/2/07

The Lord did indeed choose my wife. He altered events so that we had to be together.
She definately was not the one I chose.
She is now my best friend, help meet for me, my co-minister and bass player.
If you REALLY want God to control EVERY aspect of your life he will.
And I am glad he does!

---Frank on 11/2/07

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1) My good friend was single for many, many years. God started to speak to her in her dreams concerning a man He was bringing into her life as her husband. God told her his name, where he was from, his occupation, what he looked like, even how he dressed. Well..3 months later this man walked into her church. At first he showed absolutely no interest in her, so she just keep being faithful to God and praying and gave him his space. Well...a year later, God revealed to George His plan for their...
---Holly4jc on 11/1/07

2) ...union and George became smitten! They have now been together around 13 yrs. married around 11 of them and have a beautiful boy and they are very, very happy, a perfect match. Yes...I do believe God chooses your mate IF you ask Him to and ALLOW Him to and then say YES to God's choice. Of course, you can always say no and be rebellious and do it your way. But then you miss out on God's best for you. How sad. I myself have been single 17 1/2 years and am waiting on the Lord for His best for me.
---Holly4jc on 11/1/07

We choose and pick up our spouse and not God. Pierre's reply makes sense.

Several claim they had their spouse "picked up" by god and they ended up divorced. So????

We need to ask God to help us wheneer we make important decision but the final choice lies with us.
---Caring on 11/1/07

Regrets because of rebellion in your youth?

I wonder how many people wait for the right one, no fornication, and still end up thinking they've missed it. I imagine it's a much slimmer percentage than those who goofed up.
---PBoJ on 10/31/07

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I believe that God Sovereignly guides us to the right person as we wait upon Him and walk with Him daily, Genesis 24 shows us how God can work to in our lives leading us to His choice for us
To many people marry out of God's will, un equal yoke 2 Cor. 6:14-16 Impatience and giving into the lust of the flesh has ruined many a life.
---Jim on 10/31/07

Does anyone wish that your parents would have been bold enough to lay down the consequences of sin when you were dating?
Telling you that not waiting for the right one will destroy your life?
---PBofJ on 10/31/07

Has God ever shown you who you could have had, had you not picked your own mate, what your life might have been like?
Does anyone wish that if you only knew, what you know now, you wouldn't have been rebelled against God, you would have waited?
---PBoJ on 10/31/07

Yes. I say that because in Genesis 2 God created a help meet for Adam. Also Proverb 19:14 says..."and a prudent wife [is] from the LORD".
---Rickey on 10/31/07

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God brought Isaac to Rebekah. God made Eve and brought her to Adam. We are too quick to make our own decision forgetting that God said in Isaiah, "My ways are not your ways, My thoughts are not your thoughts, they are HIGHER than your ways and thoughts." The Holy Spirit is a gentleman, He leads and guides, not picks and pushes us into things. "Thy Kingdom Come, Thy will be done," but so often we live "My will be done" and don't even know it.
---Donna on 10/31/07

Cynthia....I plead the fifth with you. God gave me the man I pestered him for and I regret it often. This has taught me that my love of men was more important than my love of God. I will continue to serve the Lord and continue to serve my husband. The Lord is worthy to be served. My husband is unaffectionate, self-righteous, and the only preacher who is right (in his opinion).
---PleadTheFifthToo on 10/31/07

I know God chose my mate, and I wouldn't trade him for all the wrong choices I dated in the past. :) It was hard to wait, but well worth it.
---kady on 10/30/07

I believe that at each point of our lives, God has the perfect people for us, but we need to be able to see who they are and understand what they are for. One could be my wife. How I am deep-down, in my character, has a lot to do with if I can attract together with and connect with the one He would prepare for me. And while He does the choosing, I have the delight and adventure of discovering her and His plan for us.
---Bill_bila5659 on 10/30/07

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"And this I pray, that your love may abound still more and more in knowledge and all discernment." (Philippians 1:9)

Most of all, instead of concerning ourselves with if we have free will to choose or if we must absolutely submit to God's choice . . . we need to be making sure we are in the right love in our relating, in order that God's love with God's wisdom and instinct will have us relating well. And this will connect you with the one you belong with.
---Bill_bila5659 on 10/30/07

I would think that God picked my wife for me. She is a good person and a wonderful Christian and loves children. We have been married since the 1960's.
---John1944 on 10/30/07

I believe God brings a mate into our lives and from there, you are free to make the decision. Remember, He is God and He does not make mistakes. I think too many people get married without placing Christ at the center of the relationship. Then, when things go bad, they say, I married the wrong person. A marriage in the Lord takes work. Most people didnt work at it then, so they are unwilling to work at it now that its broken. It's easier to say the grass is greener for most.
---Bish on 10/30/07

God can do what he pleases but in general, he lets us make the choices. He gives us the responsibility to look for Godly character and qualities. If He truly has picked one for you it will line up with Hs word and he will tell you clearly. You won't have to guess.
---john on 10/30/07

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I do not believe He does the actual picking but He sure is willing to guide and direct in our choice.
It would be too bad to make such a important decision without seeking His guidance all the way but the picking is left to each individually. P.
---Pierre on 10/30/07

Well I'm certain he picked mine. Many different people my family include kept suggesting the girl I married to me. And certainly she has proven to be an excellent wife and mate for life. Strangely one of the people who recommended my wife to me was my mother. And my mother and my wife did not always see eye to eye. In fact they did not get along very well.
---Mima on 10/30/07

Rebekah, I plead the fifth ammendment on this question. I refuse to answer on the grounds that it may incriminate me!!! LOL..LOL! God Bless..
---Cynthia on 10/29/07

Oh, do I ever wish I would have waited on God!! They say 3's a charm, but the third one was the most cruel and abusive--agh! Why didn't I listen to God? :/ Live and learn I guess.
---Mary on 10/29/07

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Actually I do believe and he has picked my mate for me. And I have picked my own man before waiting for my husband that God put in my path and the man that I had picked ended up being the wrong one. God had put my hubby in my path and we have been married 7 months and its been a year that we had known each other.
---ANN on 10/29/07

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