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Got Saved And Left Me

I am a woman who became involved with a married man whom had children. He ended up getting a divorced and later wanted to be with me. We ended up having a child out of wedlock and are now engaged. Recently he just got saved and left us after 8 years. Any advice, I am hurting and alone?

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 ---love7373 on 11/17/07
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This man had a pattern of loving and leaving from the start. I hope you did not feel his leaving you was because he got saved. I hope you do not think you could have done something different to make him stay. saved or unsaved God still gave us choices and this man's choices have been the same. It takes God and his love to rebuild our old character into his renewing our minds.. The word says we must be born again! Meaning letting the old man die, that the new man can live.your friend is just returning back to his old ways.Thank God that life goes on.Be hurt and alone no more! Jesus Christ is with you.forgive yourself and and your child still have an expected end and your new day has just begun.
---erica on 4/17/11

I understand your wishes to be with him, but it seems (I'm very sorry to say it) that the relationship was not done well, as the man was from the beginning dealing with two women, which is both improper and very difficult for him, and so the whole thing began badly, and (sorry to say it), it would have been extremely unlikely for it to have ended well

I'm really sorry to have to say that, really I am
---Peter on 4/12/11

Love: It is possible that when he was saved, he realized that either he must return to the wife he had left, or remain single, but he should not be with you, as his first wife was still alive

I know that is extremely painful for you, but it would be appropriate for him

Really sorry to write that to you

---James on 4/12/11

First let me tell you not to listen to any judgment or criticism. God often takes those that have gone through extreme situations, and can use your experience to help others. Of course, you have to go through it first. You are not alone. God needs you to realize that He is your only source. He is the Father to the fatherless. He created you for such a time as this - so even though it is painful, if you will give your pain to Him and let go, He will restore you to a level of joy that you have never known. Allow this to happen, stay close to God by praying, worshiping, listening to music. Focus on YOU and your relationship with God. There is a great song called Arms Wide Open by Misty Edwards.
---nancy5347 on 4/12/11

Lady. You are now reaping what you have sown. The man was a cad and you were even worse. You are now hurting and alone just like his wife was, when he left her, for you. I am sure the wife had many lonely and hurting days and nights. Was it ok for her to hurt? and not you? We all should think before taking another's siginificant other. Turn around is hell.And you got the worse end of the deal.You were left with a mouth to feed(for the next umpteenth years).
---Robyn on 3/30/11

As easy as it may be for me to seat here and say that : the relationship was not proper in the first place. I know what you may be going thru.

God didnt come to save the safe people but the lost and the broken.1 timothy1:15
" Come unto me all you who are heavly laden and i will give you rest."

Seek God and the rest of all you will ever need will be added to you. He is your father and he will take care of you
---brian3745 on 12/11/07

Don't worry about what some people would call you for what you have done. Everybody makes mistakes. That is part of being a human. Christain or not, people make mistakes. You just learn from them. Like I said in a previous post find some strong, supportive women to help you. You don't need people who are gonna tell you that you messed up, you need people who are gonna tell you you'll get through this, and just take care of that child and love them.
---mary on 11/20/07

Are you a Christian? If so, you need to repent and get right with God. You have committed adultery and have a child out of wedlock. Leave this man alone, except to get child support for your child. Hopefully, he will return to his wife and family and be the husband God wants him to be.

You need to get involved in a women's group at a Bible teaching church, and take care of your child. Some would call you a homewrecker. Be careful not to make that same mistake again.
---Trish9863 on 11/19/07

Are you a Christain? I would pray about it and look for other women to help support you. Family, friends, strong women to help you get through this. And remember that even though it may be hard right now you will get through it, most likely stronger. Good luck.
---mary on 11/19/07

First off, if he's left you, you're not engaged anymore.

It reeks, but you've got to face it.

But it's no surprise--a man who was unfaithful to one mate, will be unfaithful to another.

Insist on child support, get tested for STDs, then leave the man alone. 'Saved' or not, he's bad news, relationship-wise.

And next time, (if there is one) make sure you use a condom--you don't want to catch (or pass on) anything that would keep you from living long enough to raise your child.
---Nancy on 11/18/07

Be thankful that God is saving you from a life of further devastation and misery.

Take care of your child or children, get right with God. Find some Godly friends to hang out with, pray with and a church where you can saturate yourself with God's Word, and learn how to make wise decisions in the future.
---Cindy on 11/18/07

Obviously, now that he is a Christian, he realised that the way you are living is totally wrong but I cannot understand why he is trying to solve that by leaving. If he loved you and, especially as you have a child together, the logical solution would have been to suggest that you get married. I am wondering if he has gone temporarily to try and sort out his feelings. I'm guessing he is very confused at the moment. Am I correct in guessing that you are not saved? If so, this might be causing his dilemma.
---RitaH on 11/17/07

I don't mean to sound judgemental, but I suspect there are some pieces of the puzzle missing from your account.
---Jack on 11/17/07

Yes! I have only one thing to advise you. next time you are tempted to commit adultery with a married man, don't do it. Hopefully, this man can reunite with his wife whom he divorced because of you. That would be the Biblical thing to do.
---Susie on 11/17/07

Are you saved?

Repent of the sin of adultery and ask God for forgiveness. If you have not done that already, the enemy can come in and sift you like wheat.
The devil could tempt you up with another unbeliever because of your aloneness and hurt.
---Bob on 11/17/07

Only God, Jesus Christ, can restore your life from this point forward.

Repenting and forgiving.

This serious sin led to serious consequences, and you don't want to repeat any of the steps that led you there.
Repenting can keep you from falling victim to another spiritually dangerous situation.
Your child is your number one responsibility now.
---Bob on 11/17/07

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This man should financially support his child, he is responsible.
He is accountable for all of his children.
He doesn't get off the hook.

I am reminded of Abraham.
God's man for you would not come by way of breaking up another marriage.
---Bob on 11/17/07

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