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Should We File For Divorce

My wife and I prayed for an end to our engagement if it wasnt right. 8-months married, she leaves, quoting "Christ forgives ALL sins." I believe not reconciling each day is knowingly disobeying! 12 months now, feeling guilty, she asked ME to file! She says she loves me, Prayers? Advice?

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 ---JJay on 11/22/07
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Do not file for divorce. Let her do it if she wants out. She may want you to file so to avoid accountability to the words of jesus which are Mark 10:12 And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery. It pains me deeply to hear of this. I dont know why she says she loves you, this is not love. And, if she does... she would be willing to work with you on making the marriage work.
---Wal_Rev on 10/26/08

If you do not want a divorce, then do not file. Pray for your marriage. Ask your wife to consider marital therapy to find out what is going on between you. If she wants a divorce, then she should file. That is how I handled it.
---Trish9863 on 10/18/08

If you hate your mate, God will not forgive you. Hatred will keep you from entering heaven. Forgive one another or our heavenly Father will not forgive us.

Sorry that you're confused, sue.
---lovable_linda on 12/3/07

Blessings to you JJay, I have read the replies to your question, and may I say that the truth that you are concerned about your wife, more than yourself is exactly what God would want you to do. I can see God in you and I think that you are a good example of a Godly husband, something hard to find these days. I will Pray for your wife, as well as for you. Thank you for being obedient and faithful to our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. God Bless!
---Cynthia on 12/3/07

Cindy, I cant help it: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? I'm trying to follow this thread but I'm confused.
---sue on 12/3/07


It sounds as if your wife has issues that would prohibit her from being a good wife, at least at this time, and did not realize it until after she was married.

In such a case, where the ramifications of a marriage contract were not properly understood, a divorce could be considered equivalent to an annulment, where a marriage is dissolved because one or both of the parties involved is incapable of fulfilling the duties marriage requires.
---Nancy on 12/1/07

From A to the H's and from the M's to the W's, there is a person who has a very troubled marriage but a more serious situation at the church.
Time is running out.
---Cindy on 11/30/07

Yes Jay, I beleive there are two sides to a coin, and many sides to truth. Some were married while in sin, then became saved and all things became new. Then some backslid and had an affair, Some are married to a spouse who may hate their guts and even sets out to kill them....I say run with your life, Some are married to Psyco's, crossdressers, homo's, pedofiles, then don't find out until after the wedding. Oh my goodness. the list is endless.
---Whisper on 11/30/07

I'd say, start fresh, now...with God, see how He has you able to see things better than just who is guilty of sin. Prayer starts with our attention to "our Father", not to "our sins" (o: After He gets you clear in His peace, see how you can manage things. It's not enough to "get off the hook" > Jesus stayed hung with the nails, to help us.
---Bill_bila5659 on 11/29/07

JJ::The power of prayer is great, but ultimately it is YOUR choice that causes the ball to drop."What God has joined out together Let NO man put asunder".Divorce is a cop out & telling God I do not wish this cross It is Too heavy."Its your to take to keep or break ,but PLease, before you start Remember, Its, "A Heart", "A VOW" you BREAK.If both parties are willing to stay the course.
---Emcee on 11/29/07

If she said she'd rather go to hell than live with a man again then was living with you all that great? Nevertheless, Paul said, if the unbeliever wishes to part, let them part. I'd let her do the divorcing, not you. If you are sure she is an unbeliever, you are free to let her go. But seeing you wish to keep her, you will have to be such a nice guy that she is will want to stay.
---john on 11/29/07

Cindy, you are so wrong. 1. Its my wife, not my husband. 2. No adultry that I know of 3. Repent of what? Living to God's Word? 4.How do you know the time my house will fall, are you prophecying? 5. Have not hidden ANYTHING from friends, they know what happened YOU think you are seeing through things is wrong. False prophets, need I say more?
---JJay on 11/29/07

Marriage may be a sacred institution but should not become a bondage for either partner. It is better to get out of a relationship even if married before children happen on the scene.
---lee on 11/29/07

Regardless if 'daddy don't look so good, anymore', it's time to turn to God and turn to your husband. He needs help and so do you.
You've made us a part of your life, whether you know it or not. It was very imaginative but your misery has always come through, loud and clear, in every way that you've presented it.
Comparative religions courses cannot hide it and neither do all of the names.
---Cindy on 11/29/07

Over the course of two years, in imaginative ways that have been presented...
There is a person with a marriage in serious trouble. There has been unfaithfulness and adultery.
God is telling you to repent and seek a deliverance.
Do I care about you, yes, I do.

If you do not heed the road signs that say say, Dangerous Curve Ahead, it will all be exposed. God has given you month after month after month to repent and set your heart back on the right course.
---Cindy on 11/29/07

The ultra serious part is teaching/ preaching to others. God is a God that will not be mocked.
Get your house in order or the house of cards is coming down in a matter of weeks and not months.
There is no such thing as a Critical ministry of criticism and pride. Griping about your spouse in every way imaginable is no longer going to work.
Because you are touching other lives, you must seek help ASAP, before exposure comes that will be a critical affront to pride and pocketbooks.
---Cindy on 11/29/07

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Everything that's done in secret becomes exposed in the light, sooner - rather than later.
No more riding the fence. This is where the rubber meets the road. Unloading all of your troubles here does not make it go away.
It's there. It's visible and other people are seeing through it, not only here but among the people who really know you.
---Cindy on 11/29/07

No more negotiations with God. Surrender every resentment, anger, temper, bitterness and unforgiveness. Repent and receive God's restoration in your life. Time is running out.
---Cindy on 11/29/07

Cindy, THANK YOU, I agree completely with what you said, except "she is here right now"? She is not here physically or spiritually that I know of
Whisper,I agree with you EXCEPT "divorce is not sin" The commandments are endless in scripture, from Jesus's own mouth! MK10:9, Ro7:2!!!
---Jay on 11/29/07

God can deliver this marriage, mental conditions, and the need to present your case in 52 different ways, 52 weeks out of the year.
---Cindy on 11/29/07

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She is here right now.
You both need Jesus Christ, and healing and restoration in your marriage.
You made a commitment to each other, I presume, now you need to make and keep that commitment with God.
---Cindy on 11/29/07

There are two sides to every story. Divorce is NO SIN. There is not one commandment that says THOU SHALT NOT DIVORCE. I truly beleive that God will allow divorce though HE hates it, AND SO DO WE, but it happens! And God does have mercy, HIS MERCYS ARE NEW EVERY MORNING, man is born unto trouble, God is keeping the score, not everything is as it appears, but just know this, ALL THINGS WORK TOGETHER FOR GOOD TO THOSE THAT LOVE THE LORD.
---Whisper on 11/29/07

WOW, I am SHOCKED at this! 1 sided? If she were here we could ask! Where's fault lie? I obeyed my Lord EVERY step, trying to have my house in order! Change of attitude? NO, I LOVE THIS WOMAN, I only ASKED for prayers! AND YES, I AM FREE! Read 1Cor7:15 BUT I still choose HER!
---Jay on 11/29/07

"Separation and eventual divorce may just be the best decision the "wife" could have taken" I THOUGHT this was a site of Christian followers whom loved the Lord and followed His Word. I am truly sickened. This kind of advice is maybe why our Church today is in the shape it is!
---Jay on 11/29/07

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From ", Prayers? Advice?" to:
"Be sure to pray for us!!! The power of prayer, especially in numbers, is so powerful.
---jay on 11/23/07"
And now is:
"Thanks guys, I realize I am freed from sin here, but just pray for her and her salvation." and "Please EVERYONE pray for this soul."
---JJay on 11/26/07
---Nana on 11/28/07

In just 3 days the teller seems at peace and far removed from the issue. No
sense of anguish or suffering loss, well, those emotions were really never
expressed at all. Separation and eventual divorce may just be the best
decision the "wife" could have taken and perchance in time she may start
seeing "man" in a different light.
---Nana on 11/28/07

Where does the fault lie? What could possibly make this "wife"
say such as "I would rather go to Hell than live with a man again"?
This has been a one sided story so far and there has been a
suspicious attitude switch in no time from the story teller...
---Nana on 11/28/07

Thanks guys, I realize I am freed from sin here, but just pray for her and her salvation. Just recently she was so frustrated with scriptures given to her she said "I would rather go to Hell than live with a man again" Please EVERYONE pray for this soul.
---JJay on 11/26/07

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Christ does forgive ALL sins, but she might want to think about the consequences that come with that choice. Wait on the Lord Jay, seek Him with all your heart. If she will not commit to reconciling the marriage through the Lord, she may not be a believer after all. Let her file.
---Bish on 11/26/07

It sounds like your wife is taking advantage of God's grace and mercy. Which is dangerous grounds. She may love you, but J Jay, she isn't "in love" with you. There is a big difference. If she is in love with you then she wouldn't want a divorce from you. If this is how she truely feels, then have her file for a divorce. She wants you to file for the divorce so she will look "innocent" and you guilty. Make her do it if there is no reconciliation.
---Rebecca_D on 11/24/07

I would try marriage counseling with a Christain counselor. If she still thinks a divorce is the answer and you don't then she needs to file it.
---mary on 11/24/07

JJay, my heart goes out to you. Although not reconciling may be disobedience/sin, it is something that takes 2, so if you do all you can you are not in sin if not reconciled. We all have our faults, just keep bringing yours to the Lord, seek Him, fast and pray. Know that He is your Comfortor, your all in all. He is near to those who are brokenhearted.
---Christina on 11/24/07

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MOSES said because of the harding of the heart he suffered it{divorce} tobe so,but it was not so in the begining.

---LIONEL on 11/23/07

Be sure to pray for us!!! The power of prayer, especially in numbers, is so powerful.
---jay on 11/23/07

read---Matthew 5:31-32, Matthew 19:3-9, Mark 10:2-12,1Corinthians7:10-17 Deuteronomy 24:1-4 these chapters should help you.
---judy on 11/23/07

1 Corinthians 6:1-11 shows me that two Christians who are married are not to take their marital problem before unbelievers in secular court, but are to settle their issues with Christ's obedient people ruling as God's Family. Or else, they are denying God's word and Jesus and denouncing the Bride of Christ. So, why does she want you to join her in doing such a thing? NOT because she loves you!!!
---Bill_bila5659 on 11/23/07

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