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Having A 6 Month Affair

I do not know what to do. I have been with my husband for over 6 years and found out he has been having an affair with a co-worker for 6 months. He is in love with her. We have 4 children. I made him move out but I love him. What do I do to get over this?

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 ---Heather on 12/12/07
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Yes, forgive by God's grace, but at the same time, I'd dump him out on his ear and make sure he pays child support, get a lawyer. Honey, he's stepped all over you and broken his vows and hurt your children at the same time. I'd toss him out with the garbage, honey!
---Mary on 12/15/07

Your letter caught my attention. I agree with the one who said that Jesus forgives. In Exodus it says that if we do not forgive then God does not forgive us. My husband use to hit me, and I do not believe in divorce. It got to the point 5 years ago when I prayed asking God what I should do because he scratched me so hard I bled. I could not get him to church nor counseling. God told me to let Him do the rest. Sweetie get him to go talk to your Pastor. God healed our marriage, and my husband got saved.
---Victoria on 12/15/07

If he's still in love with her, I don't know what you can do but pray--and kick him out! Not to be blunt but I took a lot of abuse and adultery in my time for the spouse's sake. Yes, we have to learn to forgive, with God's grace, but we don't have to be doormats. Make your husband decide: you or her.
---Mary on 12/14/07

To honest it is not as easy as it sounds but take one day at a time. Jesus forgives and so can we no matter what.
---Georgina on 12/14/07

I understand what you are going through it happened to me. It really hurts. It takes along time to heal and regain trust, but by the grace of God we did. Leaving was just never an option for me. I was determine to save my marriage. It wasn't easy. I still have days when I think about what happen. But things are better and my marriage is stronger. You can do it.
---Debbie on 12/14/07

Moving is not always possible for everyone as a matter of spin or cleaning up the mess.
If the same mindsets and hearts are moving, it won't be long before you have to move again. As with changing jobs, there also needs to be a change of heart to prevent another cycle of spin.
---lovable_linda on 12/14/07

Marriage is worth saving. If he is willing to go to counseling and turn from his ways, you should try to forgive and move on...I would suggest a job change and possibly move. For your four children, and for your happiness. Again marriage is worth saving!
---Heather on 12/13/07

This kind of thing is happening so often it makes one think there is not much love out there anymore. Although you have the right to separate and even divorce him, reconcilliation is God's first choice. Do what you can to reconcile. Pray earnestly that there is hope for this and get lots of friends and family and church to help in your life while you are healing from this. I've seen some really impossible cases turn good. May God have mercy on him for what he is doing.
---john on 12/13/07

Seek ministerial counseling and/or medical help, Heather.
---lovable_linda on 12/13/07

---Whisper on 12/13/07

It depends on how much faith you have.

come unto me all you who are weary and burdened and i will give you rest" Matthew 11:28

so before you can let emotions and anger take over.Go to God with your husband. Above all you have to forgive your husband. That doesnt neccessarily means reconciliation.However God requires us to. "Trust in the Lord and lean not on your own understanding in all your ways acknowledge him and he will direct you" Proverb 3:5
---brian3745 on 12/13/07

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