Is Dating Okay With God
As a divorced man, I feel God wants me to date many women right now so that I don't "rush in" to something serious. I also do not know if marriage will ever be in my future again. Is this type of "dating" okay with God?
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---Dan on 1/7/08
Helpful Blog Vote (9)
The 1st thing to realize is that we must separate from the world's view on dating because God's way contradicts the world's (2Peter2:20).We are told (by society)to date around as much as we want,going through as many people as possible. Instead,we should discover what kind of person we are getting into a relationship with before making that commitment.We should find out if the person has been born again in the Spirit of Christ John3:38,and if they share the same desire to be as Christ was. Philippians2:5.
---Court7646 on 2/29/08|
# 1 I wonder what Dan means by "dating"?
Maybe he feels that God wants him to meet many women.
In practical terms that would seem to be a good idea, as he would then be able to decide which ones it is worth meeting again and then again, until he finds the friendship with one of them may lead to thoughts of marriage.
That seems a good idea, so he does not just fall into the arms (and marriage) with the first one who smiles at him.
Did I say practical?
---alan_of_UK on 1/11/08|
# 2 Did I say practical? Yes and I know some will criticise me for saying that, and that God will show Dan the one who is for him.
Yes and this is one way in which God shows us the right one.
God has a practical side, and wants us to use our judgment.
---alan_of_UK on 1/11/08|
# 3 But if Dan means by "dating" having close deep relationships with many women, that would be wrong.
He would be playing with their emotions, and by having many women, he would be cheating on them all, as they would each probably be hoping for a permanent outcome.
he would certainly be acting in a non-Christian manner if he behaved like that
---alan_of_UK on 1/11/08|
Well, don't be sad for me. If God doesn't want me to ANY fun I will have fun when I get to heaven. GROW UP.+
---catherine on 1/10/08|
There are people who post on these blogs because they have wisdom honestly want to help.
There are people who post here who believe they are righteous and want to condemn anyone else who isn't equally righteous.
There are people who post here because they think they know everything but don't have the faintest clue.
When you ask questions here, you have to deal with all of them, and sort out the wheat from the chaff yourself.
---StrongAxe on 1/9/08|
NO!! What do you think dating is for?
If you feel youll never get married then why do you feel you want to date?
Dating is a prelude to marriage.
If all you want is companionship then all you should be looking for is a friend or fellowship with a woman?
---Shawn.M.T on 1/9/08|
Well don't feel sad for me. IF God does not want me having any fun I will have fun when I get to Heaven. Praise God.
---catherine on 1/9/08|
It's sad that someone has nothing to do in their life for fun except these blogs. Life is full of wonderful and joyful things to do. Get out of your house and enjoy them.
---Susie on 1/9/08|
God have provided help, for it!, be sensitive to the voice of the Holy Spirit, for he will constantly remind you of God's plan and show you how to carry it out. Remember that your body is the temple of the holy spirit. When you do somethings that you know is wrong you will not be at peace with yourself so, try and be conscious of what you do in life because some of what you do fixes your destiny. God bless you as you remain in him. Please read Romans 8:1-6.
---chichi on 1/9/08|
A divorce man. Why were you divorced? Answer me and I might with the help of God give you some advice that would put this to an END.
---catherine on 1/9/08|
i think what bothers some about this question is that you feel God is leading you to date but you also dont want to be married again. Thats where you need to spend some time alone with God and figger that question out. otherwise you are entering in to romatic relationships with no plan to see it thru. thats selfish and unfair to the women your dating. talk to your pastor and submit to his guidance. i know as someone divorced my pastor would want to know before i took any woman on a date.
---Kraus on 1/9/08|
I believe that we should lighten up. Blogging is fun and a great privilege. I mean some of parts of the world you don't get to do it. We do not always have to be so serious. Love for people means not to be easily offended. So lets have some fun. For some of us it is our FUN. ++
---catherine on 1/9/08|
I guess our brother is not talking about jumping from one woman to another or having a lot of girlfriends, he could be saying that God wants him to be sure about the woman in his life before he commits himself. if there is no love move on until you find love could be the massage behind his massage and if thats the thing then well and fine.
Please lets use polite words, this is a christian site.
---Ntombi_Mercy on 1/9/08|
You mentioned that you "feel God wants me to date many women...." and later you ask "Is this type of "dating" okay with God?" Aren't you contradicting yourself? By the way, what type of "dating" are you referring to? I think your issue here is not "dating" per se. What was the cause of your divorce? And if you do not address the real cause of your divorce, then that may be detrimental to your relationship with your future partner. All the best.
---Johnny on 1/9/08|
2. Kady is quite correct. God would not lead you to behave this way but, if you truly are a Christian - and you say you are, then seek His will for you. God does not lead us into a cul-de-sac (we ALL manage that quite well on our own). When we take a wrong turn and make a mess of things it is because we took our eyes off Him and did things our own way. Just slow down and let Him lead you where He wants you to go.
---RitaH on 1/9/08|
The God you all pray to, I Call Father...
The one who spilt his Blood for you, I Call Brother...
So, with that said, NO it's Not OK to be doing what your doing(Dating)and if you have lust or you are Fornicating, you will go straight too Hell when you Die!
My Brother Explained this Very Clearly!
And now your Cloak is removed, So be careful, No excuse when you stand before God, you've been told the Truth...
If it's Gods Will, you will have one, I will pray for you on this matter.
---Duane_M on 1/8/08|
I think that depends on what you mean by dating. As far as I know, there is no record of anyone in the Bible dating. When it comes to relationships between men and women, it only mentions friendship, marriage, concubine situations which always seem to end in disaster. I think the world, nowadays, has a very twisted way of looking at dating. So to make a long story short, I think that God approves of dating as long as you remain pure while doing so.
---Tracy9587 on 1/8/08|
Unless you divorced for reasons of fornication/adultry, you are still bound to you wife and should not be dating or considering marriage anyway. You want to date lots of women. God is not telling you to do so. sorry:)
---jody on 1/8/08|
You still have to draw a line between
lust and freedom.Its better to marry than to burn,as it is written.
---Jack_8773 on 1/8/08|
Chances are, many of the women you're dating ARE taking it seriously, even if you're not...especially if there's physical affection going on. I am a divorced woman and had biblical reason to leave my marriage, but God still had a time period he wanted me to wait before I started dating again....and I would be careful about the kissing stuff.. that can get emotions complicated way too fast. Just spend some honest time fasting and in prayer about what God wants for you. May God direct your footsteps.
---danna9955 on 1/8/08|
Dan what I find silly is that you claim that God wants you to date many women. No, my friend, it's not god that wants you but it's YOU who want to.
Yesterday I dropped a cup of coffee and made a mess in the kitchen. Was it God that made me do that? Let's not abuse God please and take some responsibility ourselves.
---Caring on 1/8/08|
I don't know why you are divorced. If you left your wife or were unfaithful then Scritpurally, you haver no business getting into another relationship. There is no mention of dating in the Bible. We are commanded to love our wives no matter who or what they are. It doesn't say in the Bible if dating more than one woman is against God's will. Unless your dating is immoral.
---john on 1/8/08|
Not the asker. There is a big difference between dating and being a playa'. Enjoying the wholesome company of wholesome women is fine. It is a lost art, conversation, friendship, and getting to really know a person as a person. Useing women to fill a hole in you is not beneficial. That's a playa'
---dan on 1/8/08|
Dan....I referred to your question as silly because that is what I honestly believe it to be. But, then maybe you really didn't want honesty. If you are a Christian, then you would know that being a "player" would not be okay with God. If you were on fire for Jesus you would be more concerned for people's souls than how many women you can date.
---Susie on 1/8/08|
Dan, I personally think you have it half right. God doesn't want you to rush into another serious relationship with a woman. However, I have to admit I do believe it's wishful thinking on your part in saying God wants you to play the field. God wants you to seek HIM, not uncomplicated dates. Only he can fill that void in your heart. Why not dig into the word and ask the Holy Spirit to give you wisdom in this area? God bless.
---kady on 1/8/08|
I am a saved man and I don't really understand the hatefulness on this site (calling my question "silly" and alluding to my not being saved). This was an honest question and I hoped for respectful and honest opinions not condescending remarks. If I am viewed as a "player", I respect that opinion and that is what I asked.
---Dan on 1/8/08|
He can only hear from God if He is saved. Mabe that is why he is asking us.
---catherine on 1/8/08|
My only answer to your silly question is that is was spoken like a true man. But, not a Christian man. Today the world calls that kind of a man a "player" and has little respect for such a man. Give the women a break and take some time to be by yourself.
---Susie on 1/7/08|
Very true and I have. I feel that this is what He wants for me, but others have said that perhaps I am doing MY will rather than God's will for my life. I have been told my dating around (and kissing around) is not Godly. Wanted to know how other Christians felt.
---Dan on 1/7/08|
You know, Dan, you're just as capable of hearing from God as anyone who posts to these blogs.
Why don't you ask Him yourself?
---Jack on 1/7/08|