Forgiveness Versus Trusting
Is there any difference between "forgiveness" and "trusting again"? I've been hurt by people in the church. Including pastors. When I believe that I have "forgiven", does that also mean that I need to "trust" my betrayer again? I just can't.
Join Our Christian Singles and Take The Relationships Quiz
---Gregory on 2/7/08
Helpful Blog Vote (5)
Gregory, forgiveness is an act of God's love upon you and one can only forgive if God has forgiven you in Christ. God's love will cause you to trust and belief in Christ. Forgiving those who sin against you is an act of Christian love in Christ. Remember this Scripture,
"Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven." Matthew 18:21,22
Trust only in Jesus Christ and not the man, for "we had the sentence of death in ourselves, that we should not trust in ourselves, but in God which raiseth the dead". 2 Cor 1:9
---christan on 7/13/11|
Is there any difference between "forgiveness" and "trusting again"? Absolutely. It's not possible to really trust if one holds onto unforgiveness,(grant pardon, remission, cease to blame).
One can forgive someone who is still in the error which caused an offense, (Jesus: Father forgive them for they know not what they know not what they do, Stephen prayed for the forgiveness of those stoning him).
We can only fully trust God. In relationships with others, when trust is broken, it needs to be rebuilt, we would be foolish to trust someone still in their error. Forgive them, yes, trust no. We are given the ministry of reconciliation, desiring others be reconciled with God, but also reconciled with one another.
---Christina on 7/13/11|
Yes. A child whose parent has hurt him, will forgive his parent and continue to trust...because, as a child, a cannot do otherwise. He instictively knows that adults have power and knowledge he doesn't posess. He must rely on adults to survive.
Chances are he will blame himself, if he blames anyone. Parents would do well to remember this.
I have seen a number of abused (even severely abused) children, and if about grade school age or younger, they will be loyal to their parent no matter what.
Adults do not always trust someone who has caused them pain (nor do they need to) even if they have forgiven them. It is possible to bear someone no ill will, and yet set limits on the relationship.
---Donna66 on 7/13/11|
forgiving means not retaliating,and not dwelling on the hurt but having hope for that person who have hurt you.in trusting we need to use good judgement that our not influenced by our past experiences but a sound judgement.
---mj on 7/12/11|
No, just because you forgive someone does not mean things are automatically swept under a rug and ignored. If you want to discuss this in more depth, message me. I will dig out my notes on this subject.
---tabit8547 on 4/8/08|
"A small child will forgive and trust you again."
---Linda3939 on 2/7/08
But he will never trust, nor forgive the wall outlet
that "bite" him, nor the stove that burned him or
the hot iron. To him, they are just "Bad, bad!".
Cain, conmutted sentence, but he had to go. Moses
could not enter the land. Forgiveness is one thing,
but to be restored to the former state one had
before the transgression, that is another.
---Nana on 2/28/08|
Proverbs4:23.Guard your heart in this situation by refusing to rehearse what happened over and over,dwelling on the people who hurt you and laboring over the weaknesses of the church.This will take humility.God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble James4:6,Proverbs 3:34.It will take forgiving attitudes and actions Matthew18:22,Mark 11:27,Ephesians 4:32,Colossians3:13 with no hint of vengeance Romans12:19.Mostly,it will take the power of the Holy Spirit working in and through you Ephesians3:16.
---Court7646 on 2/27/08|
There is an old saying, "burn me once, that is your fault, burn me twice that is my fault". Those that hurt me, I have guarded my heart from them. So they won't hurt me again. Trust is a huge 5-letter word, that must be earned. Once someone breaks that trust it so hard to get it back.
---Rebecca_D on 2/11/08|
Trust is simple it's the action of letting down your guard, setting yourself at ease.
The reason people won't do this is fear, and that's when they fail to trust God to wipe away every tear.
What is there to protect? Your life is a vapor according to one of our apostles, worse yet adding to our shame, EVERYTHING we have has been given by God.
God is protecting us, I'm not saying don't use common sense, I'm saying if it's protected already aren't you wasting your time with worry?
---Pharisee on 2/10/08|
Wow Shawn ... a lady I know put her trust in the Lord ... at least she trusted her pastor who said the Lord would protect her children from abuse, and it was IMPOSDSIBLE that her husband, a church elder, would abuse thweir daughters.
In fact she was forced to leave the congregation by the pastors.
And all the time the elder WAS abusing his daughters.
And then the church blamed her, saying it was because she must have been witholding her favours.
---alan_of_UK on 2/9/08|
Alan of UK But God will watch and guard that man in the future TO MAKE SURE HE DOES NOT ABUSE AGAIN.
As long as he keeps his trust in the Lord, Gods Word will watch & guard over him, but man still has free will to step away from the Word of God?
Just know that if you are putting all your trust in the Lord then you are safe no matter what others are doing.
The fear of man bringeth a snare: but whoso putteth his trust in the LORD shall be safe. Proverbs 29:25
---Shawn.M.T on 2/8/08|
Gregory, I believe we should be **able** to trust the person who has hurt us, but need to test if God would have us to. It is a matter of obeying God...forgiving like He wants in **love's prayer** (Mark 11:25),
being **capable** of trusting in case He so leads, while loving the person, in any case (love "bears all things" - - in 1 Corinthians 13:7). His love makes us able to relate in trust or at least readiness to, but as He decides and guides > Philippians 1:9 > 1 Peter 3:13.
---Bill_bila5659 on 2/8/08|
Trust is built on truth over time.Forgiveness is what we are asked to do following a transgression against you.Repeated Forgiveness is hard to contend with.Consider the fact You get hit in the mouth & HE says Sorry, you forgive him he immediately Turns & smacks you one more in the chops, was he sorry?Do you forgive him?rather Could You?
---Emcee on 2/8/08|
No it doesn't. You may be opening yourself up fpr more hurt. If you feel you can not trust these people stay away from them. God forgives but He also needs to be able to trust His people. There is a vast difference. Have a great Day.
---catherine on 2/8/08|
"Is there any difference between "forgiveness" and "trusting again"?" Yes, one is required of the believer, the other is not.
"When I believe that I have "forgiven", does that also mean that I need to "trust" my betrayer again?" No. Trust the Father. Forgiving the offender is sufficient, meaning, do not hold the offense again him,
Woe to the man that trust in man, who makes external perceptions his source of power and guidance.
---joseph on 2/8/08|
Forgiveness and trust are not the same thing. I've had this discussion with my husband who has abused me and the kids, he thinks that if he says he's sorry, I will forgive, and trust is restored.Scripture doesn't say that, forgivenss, yes, but that only releases my heart from seeking revenge or holding on to bitterness. It doesn't bring trust. God gave us heads too, not just hearts, and we need to use our heads to see danger. It speaks about this prudence in Scripture (Proverbs and many other places).
---Becky on 2/7/08|
Let's say a man is an abuser, and repent's ... God will forgive Him.
But God will watch and guard that man in the future to make sure he does not abuse again.
Is that true? ... Because many such men do offend again.
---alan_of_UK on 2/7/08|
I know what you mean. We are commanded to forgive but I don't recall any Scripture saying we have to trust man.
---john on 2/7/08|
Paul, in 1 Timothy 3:1-10, commands that if men want to be trusted with the "care of the church of God" (verse 5), then they must be "tested" "first" (verse 10). These would be people who Jesus has forgiven, and yet they need to be "tested" to see if they should be trusted.
So, you should forgive, but then prayerfully test how God wants a person to be trusted, I would say, Gregory.
---Bill_bila5659 on 2/7/08|
Great that you forgave.Is the person a abuser missusing authority. Are you a parent? have you ever done wrong to a child-admitted it to them and ask forgivness? A small child will forgive and trust you again. But if repeated hurt over and over that is wrong-that person is not easly trusted again -but marked. Use wisdom and council. I'm so glad you could forgive. It is easyer if the hurter admmits the wrong and begins to make it right with you. Also confront them.
---Linda3939 on 2/7/08|
When we put all our Trust in the Lord's Word, and not in man, it makes it easy to carry on and do as the Lord has said and Forgive men of their sins?
---Shawn.M.T on 2/7/08|