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Do You Have Unforgiveness

Are you holding unforgiveness in your life?

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 ---Moderator on 4/16/09
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Melissa, you have been hurt by your mom. And the pain is still there. You have to remember, that you could not and never will control the actions of your mom. You can only control your own actions. God is very interested in your own motives. The longer you remain unforgiving, whether she is guilty or not, it only hurts your walk with Christ. It's like been in chains.
One of my brothers never forgave my mom for leaving him and my other brother with my grandmother. All his life his lived with pain and hate. His whole family suffered hearing him talk bad about mom. later in life, we missed knowing his family because of him. His lived never having a joyful life. He still has not foriven her and she is dead. You have control over your actions.
---Mark_V. on 10/29/12

Yes I am. My mom has repeatedly hurt me and she says I do the same toward her. I have never hurt her. I have only told her how she has treated me and have cut her out of my life as much as possible. She only puts shame on me and makes me feel awful and that she is a victim of some kind. The family then tells me I need to talk to my mom and make it right. I am always the one that apologizes even when I know I haven't said or done anything wrong. I'm so depressed because my mom acts so angry toward me. I don't know what to do.
---Melissa on 10/28/12

no i am not holding unforgiveness in my life because that is my choice

it wasn't always the same though.....
it is a choice i made because it feels more comfortable to forgive and ignore the bad things in life

holding unforgiveness is soo energy consuming and sickening that it is easier to obey God by forgiving others even before they offend

I only worry about the ills in society and try to see if i can find godly remedies.

If society fights against evil effectively, our descendants will be safer
---PAT on 7/13/09

i have on a previous job came in contact with an woman from africa and a young man from africa, who thought that religion and belief on god was bogus. she was very cruel in her behavior and laughed at thed idea that any one could believe god for any thing.he on the other hand was one of the most kind persons i have ever met.but i have met people of all races that were just plain cruel in nature. one day whild meditating on God.he reminded me that i was not without sin and in his eyes sin is sin and Jesus said yea without guilt cast the first stone.We all have hurt someone and we dont know how bad because we dont stop to see the damage we have done.It easy to walk by when its someone else getting hurt, or to cry when someone else hurt us.
---Lucille on 5/19/09

part 2

that is why when a christian is hurt after he followed & obeyed the teachings of the bible especially the equation obedience=blessings, disobedience=curse/punishment
he holds unforgiveness & wants to get even.
what is the point of forgiveness when other christians get away with sin.
---mike on 5/18/09

part 1
first of all there are believers who does not know what forgiveness is.

mt 23:15
Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You travel over land and sea to win a single convert, and when he becomes one, you make him twice as much a son of hell as you are

2nd is christianity will say that believers are forgiven but once they go to church all they hear is nothing but sin or punishment of god because of sin.

mt 23:4 4They tie up heavy loads and put them on men's shoulders, but they themselves are not willing to lift a finger to move them.

result: they hold unforgiveness bec. christians lack knowledge & understanding
---mike on 5/18/09

No, I can forgive people ... after all, who am I to not forgive? I am far from perfect. I just thank God I am able to forgive.
---sue on 4/23/09

No: Whole lands are cursed and millions perish because of sinners violating the sanctified. God is not mocked: for what one gives is what one gets: and what one sows is what one reaps: all guilty are held accountable, and not forgiven until the guilty repent.
---Eloy on 4/23/09

No: Whole lands are cursed and millions perish because of sinners violating the sanctified. God is not mocked: for what one gives it what one gets: and what one sows is what one reaps: all guilty are held accountable, and not forgiven until the guilty repent.
---Eloy on 4/23/09

I had unforgivenss in my heart toward a certain person who molested me when I was a child. It wasn't until 10 years ago I forgave him. It was hard to forgive him for what he done. But after I converted over to Christ I knew what God had said about forgiving others, I knew in my heart that I had to. It wasn't easy because I hated this man. It took alot of God and alot of myself to forgive him and my sister because she is still with him. But it is unlike us and just like him to forgive.
---Rebecca_D on 4/20/09

"Are you holding unforgiveness in your life?"

Giving all praises to the Father, no.
He has given me to recognize that unforgiveness, hate, prejudice etc. has no place in His kingdom.
If I choose to advance in His kingdom, and I do, I must "lay aside every 'weight'-hinderance-, and the sin [of doubt or unbelief] which doth so easily beset [me]. Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ". The kingdom of God is within, I advance as I recognize, acknowledge, confess, and cast aside the errors within, through an embracing of the revelation of truth that dispels them.
---Josef on 4/20/09

The biggest betrayal I can think of is helping someone and the stole from me and lied on me
I can also think of family members who have a key to my house and while I was gone they had someone put cameras in my house and tap my phone. The police said they could not help me because they dont search for bugs in a person house. Thats not all, one family member can and took various items out of my house and nothing is being done about that ether. One thing people know is something that belongs to them. At this point I let it go but dont want them in my life. Is this unforgiveness?
I have a good bye spirit!! I can take you or leave you.
---kim on 4/18/09

Forgiveness or no, some devil or devils are taking some of God's votes away from Him.
---catherine on 4/18/09

You asked a "closed end" question (one that can only be answered with a "YES" or "NO"), but I'll offer this. A good example of forgiveness is the prodigal son's dad...

The prodigal son's dad was not FORGIVING per se ("forgiveness" never became an issue, because the dad never held his son in contempt), but reacted the same as God would (love covers a multitude of sin).

Jesus didn't just "FORGIVE" us, He "PURIFIED" our flesh (Hebrews 9:13).

OUR "forgiveness" of each other is to compensate for "CONTEMPT" of the offender (God never had "contempt", but we still needed to be "purified").
---more_excellent_way on 4/17/09

No because I walk in a state of forgiveness. Religion says I forgive you. Relationship says I walk in a state of forgiveness towards you.

I believe it's easy for me to forgive because it could possibly be a gift of forgiveness that I was given - does anyone know if this is possible? Is there such a gift?

The only other reason why I believe it's easy for me to forgive is because I know that I know we wrestle not against flesh and blood but against spirits and principalities and I believe it's people's demons that I'm waring against and I ain't got time to let the devil get me you folks remember that song? I'm showing my was popular in the 1980's by Christ for the Nations.
---donna8365 on 4/17/09

One preacher at my church told us a story about one lady who was sick. She asked two pastors to come over to her house, because she wanted to confess something. Within a couple of weeks the pastors came to see her. She confessed that she had unforgiveness in her heart towards her father, but that she forgives him now and would like the pastors to pray for her. While the pastors were praying, one saw a vision of an angel by the lady's bed clothed in white and said to his companion, "The Lord is going to take our sister home right now." When they stood up from prayer, the lady passed away. She died with the right heart toward God.
---elena on 4/17/09

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I can relate 100% to your last posting.

The only person that I'm hurting by "holding onto" unforgiveness is me. And I end up felling sorry for myself. The self pity cycle starts over again.

I pray about things, but I am reminded of the situation by just what is on the news. Criminals getting away with everything. Even murder!

Any ideas of how to << break >> this cycle? Anyone?
---Sag on 4/17/09

Sometimes one can hold unforgiveness in your heart when a situation has never been resolved and Past hurts are the worst but when you get to know God you know you must repent and forgive regardless. I was strong at one time in forgiveness in doing so was looked down on for being soft but it is such a blessing when you can dissolve that hurt in the mercy and love of Christ and let him take the hurt, forgive and move on. It's something that's you learn to do or your left with the pain while others move on unaware leaving you with the baggage.
---Carla3939 on 4/16/09

My Mother use to say "its easy to forgive, but its hard to forget". Her golden rule was "if you can't say something good about someone, than don't say anything at all". If we understand how much we were forgiven by God through the suffering of His Son, then we should be able to forgive others. I have a sister-in-law that can't forgive anyone. She goes to church and witnesses to her family and friends. None of her family attends church or visits her. She has hardly any friends. She judges and condemns her family, friends, and others. Her unwillingness to forgive others has undoubtedly interfered with her Spiritual walk. Please join me in prayer for her. Thank You!
---Bob on 4/16/09


You didn't post my last blog response about giving money to TV Preachers. I know that my response shows that I have bitterness towards TV Preachers.

Yes, I have unforgiveness that I'm praying about. Funny how churches seem to be so willing to talk about how "great" these TV Preachers are. However, when people confess that they have been hurt and "burned" by these TV Preachers, there rarely is prayer about things. You leave the church feeling like you've just been "blacklisted". That only deepens unforgiveness.

Some churches, like TV Preachers, hurt more than not going to church at all. One major reason why some people don't go to church. I don't watch TV Preachers.

---Sag on 4/16/09

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Yes. I know that the Bible says that we should forgive others, just as Christ has forgiven us, but I feel that this is easier said than done.
---Amanda on 4/16/09

Yes, I held onto unforgiveness for most of my adult life. I recently discovered that the only person that I was harming was me. In fact in many instances, the person that I was holding a grudge against didn't even know that they had wronged me. What a fool I was, so much wasted time. I have made great progress in this area and am continuing to improve. I just pray that I can be forgiven by the people that I have wronged but not for my well being, for theirs.
---TIMOTHY on 4/16/09

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