Must Submit To Husband
I am 100+ lbs. overweight, yet my husband wants me to gain more. Would it be a sin to NOT submit to him in this? I am worried about my health. I am in my early 40's. Do I submit and gain weight? It is so easy to just eat and eat because it seems to be the only thing I can do to make him happy. Thanks.
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---Lynn on 6/26/09
Helpful Blog Vote (18)
You submit to your husband as your husband submits to the Lord!! Your husband is not submitting to the Lord Jesus if he is telling you to gain more weight to risk you health! Gee, has he increased the insurance policy on you recently hoping he will kill you? Or maybe he is sadistic hoping to handicap you with the excess weight making you feel unworthy and not want to go anywhere!!! The Lord warned against gluttony (overindulgence is a lust, you can lust for food) and to seek moderation in all things. 100 pounds overweight is not moderation on any scale. I would seek counseling to determine why your husband wants to harm you. When you husband is asking you to go against holy scripture you do not follow an ungodly man.
---Follower_of_Christ on 9/20/12|
Ask yourself would Jesus ask this of you?
I think not.
A husband and wife are equal, one is not more so than the other.
Ask yourself is what you are doing harming you?
you are risking diabetes, cancer, high blood pressure, stroke. heart disease. All these percentages are increased with weight gain.
Why would your husband ask that of you.
What he is asking of you is wrong. It certainly is not God's will, far from it.
---chris on 5/9/12|
Hello,Mary,I tell you..smile the last time a man told me "go on eat all you want or just gain more weight..." I wud not do it! I would be suspicious...he got somebody in the "wings!" you all forgive me...not normal,husband's complain "you block'n the TV!" he try tell you too,big!
---ELENA on 5/8/12|
Oh sure, she'll be glad she did--until she eats herself into a heart attack! I feel very sorry for this poor woman.
---Mary on 5/8/12|
You should submit. Most women gain weight as they get older. Let it happen and make him happy. You will be glad you did.
---Tim on 5/8/12|
This question is so sad and pathetic, I won't even try to comment on it. Because if I did, I would say all of the wrong and ungodly things about this so-called spouse of yours. You are more pathetic than he is,though. But I hope someone can give you the right encouragement and scriptural advice,friend. I call you friend because I want the love of Christ to dwell within me. I choose to walk by faith and not by sight,this day. God bless.
---Robyn on 8/7/10|
I think this is one of those rare cases where only you can answer the question as to if it would be a sin not to obey. What is a sin for one person may not always be sin for another. I have seen a lot of judgement and outrage in responses, but I can tell you as someone who has had to personally answer this same question, that only God can provide the correct anwer for you. May He bless you, and know that I will be praying for you both.
---Diane on 8/6/10|
If this story is true, he needs to consider your best interest.
If you do this: 1Corinthians 11:3-10, 13, 15-16, 14:34-35, Ephesians 5:22-24, 33, Colossians 3:18, 1Timothy 2:11-14, Titus 2:5, 1Peter 3:1-2, 5-6, and he does this: 1Corinthians 7:33, Ephesians 5:25-29, 31, 33, Colossians 3:19, 1Timothy 5:8, 1Peter 3:7, this resolves the situation. A husband needs to love his wife, and a wife needs to respect her husband. Neither is optional, nor conditional. But it is difficult to do without the other persons cooperation. If your husband is asking you to do something immoral, Acts 4:19 and 5:29 allow you to say no.
---Glenn on 8/7/09|
So Trisha, she is supposed to, in your mind, submit to him till she explodes of weight gain because of his sick fetish?! He's killing her wanting her to gain over 100 pounds, I got news for you my dear: you do NOT submit to ABUSE.
---Mary on 8/7/09|
Hi, if you can't respect your husband as the head, you should not have married him. Remember submission to your husband is honor, respect, and you should be able to allow him to be the head. Now wih that coms the responsibility of being the provider for the household. Its ok for both of you to work and share bills etc. But he should be the primary provider. Many people don't think about this prior to marriage. But as the wife we should walk side by side. But the husband shoul be the leader.
---Trisha on 8/6/09|
Do not submit to him in this. THe Bible says wives submit to your husband as you would to Christ. Christ would not want you to endanger your health.
---Scott on 8/5/09|
You have to think about what is best for you. God saved you because he loves YOU not because of the tradition your culture teaches. It is selfish for him to not think about your health or how his idea of submission effects the way you see yourself. Being overweight throws your metabolism off, your digestive track does not function properly and you become unable to eliminate properly. You can get a heart attack or have a stroke. If you have children who will care for them if you die. I don't think you husband would because he is trying to kill you. You are better than this and if you have children they deserve better. This tradition that says being overweight is attractive is causing you to commit a slow suicide.
---Patricia on 7/3/09|
Somewhere in Africa, men make their women do this. They take them to this tent where they drink lots of milk and they want their women to gain weight. It causes a host of health problems.
Why are you focused on making this man happy? You should be focused on making yourself happy. It should be easy for you to please him, for you are his wife. He should be pleased just finding enjoyment in your company and being with you. If not, maybe it's time for some marital counseling. He sounds very insecure and he's probably wanting you to do this to make himself feel better.
---amand6348 on 7/1/09|
Your husbands request is against the word of God and you need to obey God first. You are the temple of the Holy Spirit and have a responsibility to take care of this temple. Being obese is not God's will.
---john on 6/29/09|
You're only supposed to submit to him when he is right, and doing or saying what God would say to you. Overeating is greed and gluttony, and those are two sins. It is not God's will that you sin. Concern yourself about doing God's will. Obviously, your husband is not looking out for your welfare.
---Betty on 6/29/09|
I think both you and your husband need to seek Christian counseling. Both situations are not healthy.
---joanie on 6/29/09|
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Lynn: My best suggestion is to get an appointment for a physical with your family doctor, and have your husband come in to discuss your bloodwork and the doctor's advice to lose weight. Talk to the doctor about your options for losing weight, diet, exercise, and enlist your husband in following the doctor's instructions.
Your husband's desire for you to gain weight is sick, and totally unhealthy for you physically, and mentally.
---Trish9863 on 6/28/09|
I would guess your husband has SERIOUS psychological problems, dear, that NEED to be treated by a competent psychiatrist. I know some will bash me saying psychiatry is ungodly, but what he's doing to you, sister, is anything but okay! You have my prayers sister.
---Mary on 6/28/09|
Alan: Good answer! One has to wonder why this guy would want to endanger his wife's life. Is he trying to kill her?
---jerry6593 on 6/27/09|
There is a condition lady to submit to the man of God as he submits to the authority of Christ and that begins and ends with Love,
Read the scriptures instead you own understanding of what indeed the scripture really says. This is what causes people to turn from God not having the proper understanding of what is said and why!
Your married to a feeder and that is dangerous and foolish to stay in a relationship without Godly principles and proper understanding of who you are in Christ and the sooner you get to know God loves you and would not ask you to over eat the sooner you can do something positive to change your life for the better.
---Carla3939 on 6/27/09|
Well, that sounds kind of strange. Why would he want you to gain weight? Has he said anything about why? I have read, I think, how a man once tried to keep his wife fat so no other man would want her and try to take her from him.
:o) Is he going to race you in a marathon?
He may be trying to rig the race. (o:
If you have a pastor who is credible with him, and/or other friends with Christian relating ability . . . pray, first, get with God as much as you can in peace, so you also have His encouragement and positive creativity, and get their help with him.
---Bill_bila5659 on 6/27/09|
I cannot understand WHY your husband would ask this of you, unless you are in a society that considers large women to be a sign of affluence. It would not be against Scripture, IMHO, to reject such a request. I would seriously be concerned about his reasoning in this, considering the potential health issues. It would be interesting to hear his answer as to why.
---tommy3007 on 6/26/09|
Lynn what is he trying to do,kill you, obesity is harmful,you don't have to answer. Anything which wiil be harmful to you is good reaaon to tell him,no,I'm going on a diet. You never "obey" anyone who tells you to harm the Temple of the Lord/Holy Ghost and that is your body. It is no sin to take care of yourself,your health. Do not submit to such an insane order. A husband is not your slave master to make you jump when he says jump. You are to see if what he tells you to do lines up with the Bible and pleasing to God Colossians 3:15- as it is fit in the Lord. Husbands are ordered by the Bible Ephesians 5:25 to love their wives as Christ loves the church and gave himself for it.
---Darlene_1 on 6/26/09|
Would you "submit" to him if he asked you to slash your wrists?
I wonder why he wants you to put on still more weight. Have you asked him?
Is he himself overweight?
---alan8566_of_uk on 6/26/09|
When husbands, parents, or any other authority ask you to do anything that is NOT lined up with the Bible, it is then okay to disobey (God is the higher authority). Your husband asking you to gain weight is against the Bible - this is because GLUTONEY (over eating) is a SIN. Yes, in this situation, it is okay to disobey and be unsubmissive - God is the higher authority in this case - listen to and obey ONLY Him.
---Leslie on 6/26/09|