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Husband's Priority List

This question is for pastors and wives of pastors. I need to know where I should be in my ministering husband's priority list.

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 ---Betty on 12/15/09
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God, self and others (spouse, then children still under ones authority, other folk), ministries / job. Christians are to esteem others and to consider what's best for them, Deuteronomy 6:4-5, Matthew 22:36-40, Mark 12:28-33, Acts 20:19, Galatians 5:26, Ephesians 4:2, Philippians 2:3-4, Colossians 3:12, 1Peter 5:5, 1John 4:19-20.
If you do this: 1Corinthians 11:3-10, 13, 15-16, 14:34-35, Ephesians 5:22-24, 33, Colossians 3:18, 1Timothy 2:11-14, Titus 2:5, 1Peter 3:1-2, 5-6, and he does this: 1Corinthians 7:33, Ephesians 5:25-29, 31, 33, Colossians 3:19, 1Timothy 5:8, 1Peter 3:7, this resolves the situation.
---Glenn on 12/18/09

There is a lot of God first going around like a pinball. God is not offended to be second if ...

Matthew 5:23: "Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee, Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way, first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift."
---Nana on 12/17/09

God needs to be first and then the wife. The man should treat her as Christ treated the church. The next and so often forgotten priority should be family in general(offspring). There is plenty of room for pastoring within these priorities. Any good pastor must first be a good steward of his own home. He sets the standards ordained by God, for the congregation by his own lifestyle. God Bless.
---jody on 12/17/09

In order to please God your husband must, and I say must,honor you also! And vice versa. If he does not and you too, your prayers will be hindered, according to the Word of God. You belong to your husband and he to you. You both have entered into a covenant and this should be upheld , at all times. Also he will not have success in what he is doing, if he neglects his marriage and his duties as a husband and father, as well. You both should honor and respect each other, at all times. In all of this, God comes first in both of your lives. And from this love and honor for God the marriage covenant will be built on the relationship that you and your husband has with God. Hopefully, it is one of love, honor and obedience to God.
---Robyn on 12/17/09

You should be #2...just like he is #2 in your priorities. Meaning, God is always 1st, you are 2nd, and ministry is last.

Husbands are to love their wive even as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her.(Ephesians 5:25, Colossians 3:19)

A husband is to spend time with the Lord. Marriage is the 2nd most important decision that a person makes in their life.
They are chosing to be with the other person & cherish him/her.

So to answer your question you should be at the top of his list right next to God. He should prioritize his time in order to spend it with you.

In Proverbs 5:18 it says, "...rejoice with the wife of thy youth."
In other words...enjoy the woman like you just met.
---Rickey on 12/17/09

Aren't some being a bit hard on Betty? I mean after all, many a pastor's wife has been starved for companionship, yes she needs to be his helpmate in ministry, but he needs to make his wife at least second on his list. A great ministry and a bad marriage is not good either.
---Mary on 12/16/09

After a person's personal relationship with God, then should come their spouse. AFter the spouse, the children. THEN, the vocation.

What is wrong that you feel neglected?

Are your priorities in order as well?

---Trish9863 on 12/16/09

The priority in your home should be serving the Lord first. If this is not YOUR priority also, then you need to think about this. You are not the first woman who asked this question. Many have become jealous of their husband's work for the Lord.
---KarenD on 12/16/09

God created woman to be a help "meet"(precisely adapted to a particular situation,need,or circumstances,very proper)meaning a help suitable to a man-husband. This in mind you may assume God picked you for your Pastor husband knowing you would be a help to him because you"fit" together to compliment each the others needs. Instead of looking at a priorty list for your husband,look at it as demands of the job for him. Talk to him without being critical,no man in any job needs to be torn in two directions by a complaining wife. Tell him your concerns being sweet and undemanding. Work together on what may can be altered to give you time together. Never be unresonable. Most of all take it to God and pray.
---Darlene_1 on 12/16/09

1. Does your husband actually have a list?
2. Is the list prioritized?
3. Has your husband invited you to participate in the activities on the list?

Unless all the answers to the above are yes, leave it alone!!!

The are some thing you will do together in a marriage and some thing you will do solo, know the difference.
---Friendly_Blogger on 12/16/09

This question indicates to me that there is more going on than you are asking. If there is some problem going on share it and you will receive help.
Then, what are your ages? Maturity does come with age. Maybe you both need to learn something.
If there are things you would not like to discuss on an open forum please feel free to contact me at Elder2291. There are others who will offer you the same service so you can pick and choose if you wish. May God bless your efforts. Keep the faith and don't give up.
---Elder on 12/15/09

-- Betty :

Sister, The question you should be asking, is to 'Yourself', .... and that question is does the place where you believe you should be in the priority list of your husband's ministry Glorify God ?? .... b/c a wife that maketh ashamed is as rottenness in her husband's bones

"Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies"

If you don't know your place as a wife, look to judge righteously & open your mouth to plead the cause of the poor & needy.

Betty, Read Pro.12:4 & 31:9-31 b/c "A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband, and the heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil".
---Shawn.M.T. on 12/15/09

Some would say that his FIRST vocation is as husband and father.

FWIW, in the Orthodox Church, men are not ordained Deacon or Presbyter without their wives' consent. No bishop will do so.
---Cluny on 12/15/09

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