Husband Has Control Issues
What is the deal with my christian husband and his control issues? He claims that he's the head of the house and he doesn't have to consult with me, but he choose to in some instances. He throws submission in my face for something as simple as deciding where a picture goes. Is this just too much control?
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---Katrina on 5/18/10
Helpful Blog Vote (12)
I believe Tiffany has the best answer so far. It's hard for women who have to take control of their household, to relinquish to a man when so many abuse the right, or walk away from it. But the Word does state the man is to be the head. Not the body, hand, arm, foot, etc... There is much more to any functioning establishment than just the head. Without the rest of the body the head means nothing..
---fay on 5/31/10|
Look at the amount of control that God gives to the husband:
Numbers 30:6 And if she had at all an husband, when she vowed, or uttered ought out of her lips, wherewith she bound her soul,
Numbers 30:7 And her husband heard [it,] and held his peace at her in the day that he heard [it]: then her vows shall stand, and her bonds wherewith she bound her soul shall stand.
Numbers 30:8 But if her husband disallowed her on the day that he heard [it], then he shall make her vow which she vowed, and that which she uttered with her lips, wherewith she bound her soul, of none effect: and the LORD shall forgive her
---francis on 5/28/10|
There is a verse somewhere in the Bible where it says that they are both the head, but people don't take that verse into account, and someone will probably ask me to find the verse and "prove" it, but usually when I do that people stop talking and don't respond to the scripture.
Did he act this way before you were married? This is why I was always suspicious of dating/marrying a Christian man. Regardless of how he treats you, I would never want a man telling me that he is my "leader," unless his name is Jesus.
---amand6348 on 5/28/10|
If this is true: "The husband is the head of the wife", I take that as meaning he is the leader or maybe its better to say in a leadership position. When any leader who fails to listen to or communicate with those that he leads, the path he walks is into foolishness and maybe into destruction. No where in the Bible does it say the wife is a door mat.
---Cowboy on 5/20/10|
Absolutely he has control issues. The bible NEVER said the woman was to be stomped on by the husband.
Your husband need to learn Christian love and what it means to be the head of the house..
THIS IS NOT IT.
---NurseRobert on 5/20/10|
The husband is the head of the wife. The wife is to reverence her husband. But controlling over where you hang a picture is silly. But for the sake of Christ peace and my own sanity I would just hang the picture where he wants. I think that when you get into a power struggle, then you find you are in a power struggle. I would get on my knees in prayer and meditation to the Word of God for help. It may be that if you cease to struggle, he may cease to try and control. FYI, a man that is cruel to his wife, has his prayers hindered. Oh and no I don't think that a husband trying to make his wife obey is directly witchcraft. immature yes, and handling it the wrong way. May you can speak calmly to him about this and then say, baby can we pray?
---Tiffany on 5/20/10|
Yes, the husband is the head of the household spiritually according to the Bible. However, control is witchcraft according to the Bible. The Bible is clear, that there is to be an equal partnership in marriage - this means he should consult with you and God on what to do and how to do it. Also, submission really means RESPECT according to the Bible, NOT being subservent as most people (men in particular) see it. Start to explain this to him, with scripture to back it up. If he does not listen, then let him know that He is in rebellion to the Bible and in disobedience to God. Remember that husbands are also to love (form of respect) their wives as Christ does the church.
---Leslie on 5/19/10|
Read "The Power of a Praying Wife" and seek the Lord for your husband's control issues. He is twisting scriptures to browbeat you into things that he has no need to control. Prayer, like the ones in that book, will help you immensely. God can work miracles.
---Trish9863 on 5/19/10|
Katrina, my boys have the same attitude and I did not teach it & they grew up without a father. It's the way satan twists scripture in the mind and it comes from pride, & pride is the original sin, it's what got satan thrown from heaven. Maybe if you can reveal other pride issues in his life he will eventually admit he is ruled by pride. Check out Prov.6:16-19.
---fay on 5/19/10|
Point out to him that the next verse says he's supposed to love you as Christ loves the Church.
All you have to do is submit.
I've noticed, however, that most people micromanage in this way when they feel that somehow their own lives are out of control.
---Cluny on 5/18/10|
Yes, it is to much much control..he is taking advantage of his part and going overboard.
---a_friend on 5/18/10|