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Formal Obituary For Me

Some newspaper obituaries give simple facts, while others say things like "died peacefully with loved ones at bedside," "was dearly loved, marvelous parent, successful in business," etc. Am I wrong to dislike the flowery ones and want to keep my own obituary factual?

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 ---Geraldine on 4/7/12
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hello,Mary..thanks,well girlfriend let me tell you this city God knows! too,many folks on/or involved "street drugs/or pharmacy drugs! friends via internet (all u.s.) warn me don't trust anyone 'n your home when get cancer med. & a lady told me be carefull son-n-law plan to hit my house! So,whole year I did strength/weights! Built up immune system..Train'....I used to be a sec.officer,athlete, furniture mover,yatta! So,made up my mind No meds! 'fight'n to live.. & then defend myself for meds.?!! a reg.pain pill once 'n a while. Mostly prayer! God is good! Thankyou Mary.
---ELENA on 4/11/12

Hi Elena, wow I really admire you girlfriend! :) No cancer meds or pain meds--you're tougher than me--and very smart to avoid addiction. I take some pain meds but not a lot. Tonight's have really made me itch lol! You're such a sweetie, God bless, Mary
---Mary on 4/10/12

Thankyou,both Anon & Mary! Love goes out to you both! Hey,Mary keep 'n touch with me and Anon you too! Be my friend believe me Mary & alot of great people on here we cheer each other up!Anon my family most gone now,but,old customs family Cuban & African my mother's side..they really both cultures not warm /on illness like cancer, death...they have many fears,superstitions Cubans(not catholic) the religious catholics more compassion. My family are not catholic. My granmother was christian. praying pain stop,God answers! I do not want to get heavy into meds. No! I took training long ago! The drs. Said I will do better than most! Becuz,I was a former athlete :) Prayer works!I have no cancer meds.avoid addiction.
---ELENA on 4/10/12

Moderator permit-thanks! Mary,you may remember I had this friend she said "I am like family! Don't worry she said If I go to be with Jesus(heaven bound) by faith :) she sad ELENA don't worry,we love you 'n we be there for you!"...and yes,some years ago I did stand 'n the gap! For her 'n literally put my life on the line for her! Home invasion/ nobody got hurt! put my life on the line! She is a strange person...she is not saved! So,uh...just words,she left with cash I to go get food I was really needy!eyes bad! remember?...she went out of state for 2 weeks. No food. No money. I told her husband I forgive her. She has not even called or spoken since! Jesus my friend here!
---ELENA on 4/10/12

hello,family,took me many yrs. to calmdown about the subject of death.that's why I believe Christ is the answer,my heart is not perturbed,worried knowingthe saviour his love,goodness Rom8:35-38who shall separate us from the love of Christ?Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword?.....(not all will fit) Love always!
---ELENA on 4/9/12

I figure that someone else can worry about the arrangements when I die. A recent funeral I attended was for a woman who was a Christian, but who had some issues. The pastor used the word "onery" in describing her.
---KarenD on 4/9/12

One must be very careful after an obid is published in the paper as there are crooks that will send you bills saying that your deceased owed them money.
---lee1538 on 4/9/12

Hi Elena, I'm so sorry about your family, that's awful! :( And so sorry about the newspeople showing up and asking blunt questions like they do--ugh! They can be sooo unkind! Anyway, how are you feeling today hon? Hope God is blessing you with comfort and healing, love and hugs, Mary
---Mary on 4/9/12

Hello ELENA, thank you for your condolences.

I am so sorry to hear you had to go through the same thing. My heart goes out to you. Know that the Lord revealed the TRUTH to your mother when her spirit left this earth. That's my only consolation, that the Lord told my mother the truth about me. I love you and am so sorry that happened to you.

Thank you again for your heartfelt condolences. I appreciate you posting that. (((huggss)))
---anon on 4/9/12

hello,Anon...this is ELENA,can certainly give you my sympathy & yes,my familydid me the same way! Been many yrs. Very cruel. I cud not make my own mother's funeral becuz they wud not help me even knowing at that time I was ill,couldn't get around well and had just gotten out of hospital.the news people were on my doorstep gett'n ready with cameras...exclaim "do you know who killed your mother?"....was a total shock! You certainly,have my dearest condolenses,may the lord watch over 'n be your comfort this hour. Love in Jesus name. ELENA
---ELENA on 4/9/12

My mother died on March 4th and my sister had the funeral without telling me she died (and still hasn't told me). I had to hear it from a friend of the family. How cruel is that? I've had no closure with my mother and I still don't understand why. No obitutary was in the paper because my sister didn't want me to know. Very cruel thing to do. I hope they got Joy out of keeping me from going to my mother's funeral..what a sick family I have. It hurts deeply.
---anon on 4/9/12

This is timely. A good friend (a second mother) died yesterday. Her daughter, in making the arrangements, was charged $300 for a few lines in the local paper. Talk about a rip off....
---NurseRobert on 4/8/12

Newspapers charge for obits by line. If you choose, you can write what you want it to say, and give it to your immediate family member. However, you have no control over what your family members choose to have your obituary say once you are gone.
---Trish on 4/8/12

You don't have to do something just because someone else does it.

But I might want my family and church people and friends to be included in what we share in something about me when I die . . . not me dictating everything. Make it a family thing.

"nor as being lords over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock." (1 Peter 5:3)

And enjoy. Die right. Dying, I think, is part of life, something to get ready for and do right so it is a good thing.
---willie_c: on 4/8/12

Obids cost money and during a time when there are far more pressing needs that requires money.

What is interesting about death and what we see in the Obids, is that the deceased is almost always sent to heaven, into the hands of our loving Savior.

While the Pope may make a pronouncement that someone merited heaven by his good works, there is really no way one can determine absolutely who belongs to the Lord and who does not much less who did or did not end up in heaven.

In Adventism, the poor soul will not know until their investigative judgment and if one has not observed the Sabbath and the rest of the commandments, will not merit eternal life. SDA will scream that is a lie, but it is in their literature.
---lee1538 on 4/7/12

Sometimes "died peacefully with loved ones at bedside" IS a factual statement. One of the things we pray for in the Orthodox Church is "a Christian ending to our lives, painless, blameless, and peaceful."

There was a time that dying with one's loved ones praying around him (or her) was considered the best way to leave this life, short of martyrdom.

But you have the right to have your newspaper obituary say what you like.

Glory to Jesus Christ!
---Cluny on 4/7/12

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