I was married for 25 years, it was the hardest thing I have ever done. Until my ex went through a mid-life crisis (Important to note that most people that go through a Mid-life crisis don't recognize that they are going through one.)
For the first few years I would beat up on myself until I read the book Relationship Strategies by Dr. John Kappas. Dr. Kappas explains Left Brian vs. Right brain dominance, baseline sexuality and the difference between the Honeymoon and the trauma stages of a relationship.
I would highly recommend this book to both married couples and single people. Rev. Tom Zegan CCHt.
---Tom_Zegan_CCHt. on 10/23/12|
What's so hard about marriage? I've been married to my wife 49 years and the "honey moon" is not over yet. The secret to our marriage is we ALWAYS put God as our top priority. We put each other as our as our second priority and our children as our third priority.
agreed! marriage is not hard when priorities are straight. it is easier to live together in harmony when both are in agreement. one reason why Believers are warned to not go into a marriage unequally yoked spiritually.
---Follower_of_Christ on 10/4/12|
'christian' or not, it is 50/50.
we start marriage with a vow or promise, which jesus told us emphatically not to do.
roughly 50% of the couples get over this sin and 50% do not.
(ironically, most christian merges are done in churches that say, "we follow ALL the commandments and instructions of Jesus". thank God, there is One who is willing to save us from ourselves.)
get over the others broken promises, and start doing what you said you would do.
---aka on 10/3/12|
It isn't. Being disrespected is.
---Sarah on 10/3/12|
How we,as a society make something beautifull, become so hard,.? We claim to be civilized,but we are one thing, alot of us was not learned,grounded in church,people western countries,we don't. Take time to get to know each other,one out to impress, the other posess,? when we get to the place JESUS is the head of this marriage, we put God first ...it will almost like heaven on earth...when a man fines a wife he find a.good thing,!
---ELENA on 10/3/12|
All that gives glory to God is fought by the devil- laughter, health, unity and the wholesome life or abundant life He sent His Son to give us. Marriage is part of that good life the devil wants to destroy so it will be difficult. Fight back!
---Mwatamanta on 7/24/12|
being married wasn't difficult for me. what is difficult is when you loose your mate you have had for 50 years. we find out then he did a lot more around the house than we gave him credit for.
---shira4368 on 7/23/12|
---Trish on 7/22/12
May I add to your good comment? Thank you.
Proverbs 13:10 Only by pride cometh contention: but with the well advised [is] wisdom.
---francis on 7/22/12|
Marriage is difficult because it consists of two human beings who are too often seeking for self fulfillment instead of sacrificing for the other.
---Trish on 7/22/12|
Marriage is a give & take contract between two completely different individuals. You agree to disagree on the unimportant issues & be willing to discuss the major ones. PRAY TOGETHER over the disagreements & come together with a plan that both people can live with......That's how it should be settled, but not always the case...this is the reason things become difficult. Selfishness.Plain & simple. Some people want what they want & don't care how the others feel about it or how their wants affects others.
---Reba on 7/21/12|
What's so hard about marriage? I've been married to my wife 49 years and the "honey moon" is not over yet. The secret to our marriage is we ALWAYS put God as our top priority. We put each other as our as our second priority and our children as our third priority. We spent 33 years on the mission field and it was the type of mission work that required us to work together at all times. (It was a medical work.) My attitude has always been: God didn't give me a wife and children just to neglect them to "save" the world.
---wivv on 7/21/12|
Marriage doesn't come naturally. It is not easy. Exhibiting the fruits of the spirit can be a daunting task at times. I agree it is hard! It does not get easier, people change and grow and new issues develop in life. It is how you handle the hurdles. I am married to a believer, but he is new to the faith (4 years) I feel we are unequally yoked, but I strive to live it out God's way and realize it is not my reason for being here. It is a marriage, but I have a greater purpose in furthering God's kingdom, when I stay focused on the that the marriage doesn't seem so hard....
---De on 7/21/12|
Why is being married so hard?
---liza on 7/19/12
Who says that being married is hard?
If you are both following God then it is not hard.
This is where most married people are having difficulties:
1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman [is] the man, and the head of Christ [is] God.
Ephesians 5:23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
---francis on 7/20/12|
Jesus guarantees us >
"'Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.'" (Matthew 11:28-30)
Jesus guarantees this to "all". So, even if your spouse is stubborn and impossible, you can learn with Jesus and His yoke will be easy and His burden is light.
"But the way of the unfaithful is hard." (in Proverbs 13:15) People are in trouble now because they did not make sure with God about whom they married. But now they can learn so the yoke is easy . . . even if their spouses fight this.
---willie_c: on 7/20/12|
For me, or my wife?
Men are funny ducks. Women are not. They're generally too practical.
Men like aggression, to get their way. Women want to talk about it, at least.
Most marriage problems come from men disrespecting their wives as equals. Then there's the whole head of the woman thing, and religious ideas of authority.
A mother is what a man needs, but can't have. A woman hates being likened to her mother. Watch out guys.
My wife and I figured it out a while back, marriage is suicide of the soul. Dying to self and seeking the others' needs first is the only way. Someone else showed the way. It cost Him His life.
---Phil on 7/19/12|
Because anything worth working for is hard. Didn't you know that?
Glory to Jesus Christ!
---Cluny on 7/20/12|