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Sister Or By First Name

Recently I have become a member of an Assembly of God Church where many women address the pastors wife by her first name. This seems less respectful to me. Our Pastor asked from pulpit that she be addressed as Sister, but members still call her by her first name. What's right?

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 ---Carmen_Chilson on 10/5/19
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Cluny, you are so funny.

You complained when we go off topic.

Now you are asking us to stop discussing the original topic.

Maybe, you just say what is real on your mind.

'Nicole and Kathr, Knock it off!'

Carmen might like that better than stopping her blog completely.
---Nicole_Lacey on 10/17/19


I just had a marvelous idea.

Since nobody here is actually a member of this particular church, except the original poster, why don't we just drop the subject.

Glory to Jesus Christ!
---Cluny on 10/17/19


Since the poster ASKED others....no one is butting in anothers marriage...SO LAUGHABLE NICOLE.

I still say let the woman speak for herself. Maybe if SHE got up in the pulpit and made HER WANTS KNOWN , people would listen.

The issue here was WHY do they still call her by her name when her husband says not to.

The questioner asked WHATS RIGHT? which means asking a question. If she didn't want interference, she should not have asked


SO AGAIN SO MORONIC, , SO LAUGHABLE is your comment to me Nicole.
---kathr4453 on 10/16/19


Kathr: OH THATS RICH...
SO OVERUSED AND A BOORING UNORIGINAL COMEBACK
Is everything RICH to Nicole's? Seems like it! A big eye roll here!//

Well you seems to like the word as well.

//***I hope that is RICH enough for you. I can add more RICHNESS if you'd like...just say the word.

So your being disingenuous here is more than rich.
---kathr4453 on 10/13/19

***So RICH, as in totally laughable...---kathr4453 on 10/14/19

//Neither do you Nicole..you know as much as anyone else here...and you need to be quiet since yours is also speculation.//

I am not budding into the Pastor's marriage like you.
---Nicole_Lacey on 10/15/19


It would be best to ask her what does she want. At this point a person doesn't really know what she wants. But, for now, out of respect for the pastor, I'd address her as "sister". If she prefers that her first name be used, I'd check with him and see why he wants her addressed as "sister"
---wivv on 10/15/19




Neither do you Nicole..you know as much as anyone else here...and you need to be quiet since yours is also speculation. I hope that is rich enough for you. I can add more richness if you'd like...just say the word.

So your being disingenuous here is more than rich.
---kathr4453 on 10/13/19


OH THATS RICH...

SO OVERUSED AND A BOORING UNORIGINAL COMEBACK


Rich, in this sense means highly entertaining or amusing, preposterous or outrageous, although less common today it was often found in the phrase 'a bit rich' or the ironic comment 'that's rich!' to express ironic amusement or indignation at something. The root sense is one of rich as meaning plentiful or abundant.

Is everything RICH to Nicole's? Seems like it! A big eye roll here!
---kat453 on 10/13/19


Kathr: Nicole unless you know for a fact the wife asked her husband to speak for her than I suggest you need to stop taking yourself.//

What?

Rich again.

***For the pastor to make this request, ...id have to ask, did the request come from his wife in the first place, and why isn't she personally asking others to address her as sister,---kathr4453 10/6/19

Again, how do you know she didn't?

You don't.

Maybe that's why the Pastor HAD TO make the request from pulpit.

//You are just as guilty of speculation as anyone here. Take your own advise please.
---kathr4453 on 10/12/19

You first. Plus, I never speculated the request. You did.

You are the one who questioned the request, not me.
---Nicole_Lacey on 10/13/19


Nicole unless you know for a fact the wife asked her husband to speak for her than I suggest you need to stop taking yourself. You are just as guilty of speculation as anyone here. Take your own advise please.
---kathr4453 on 10/12/19


Kathr: husbands don't own wives....or control what their name should be or whether they should be called by their name or not. Not even in Church. Remember Sarah told Abraham to throw Hagar and her son out...and he did what she asked.//

Soooooo, wives own their husband?

The example you gave suggest Sarah owns Abraham because he did want Sarah told him to do.

So, I guess the wife TOLD her Pastor husband to tell the people to call her 'sister'.

He did the same as Abraham.

If you think the wife didn't tell him please show paperwork evidence that she didn't and it was the Pastor who came up with the idea.

If not, please don't judge the Pastor of controlling his wife. Matthew 7:1
---Nicole_Lacey on 10/12/19




Nicole unless YOU are the Catholic or Roman Catholic Church....your statement holds no water. I wasn't referring to YOU...and as far as I can tell, the Title of Roman Catholic Church is still used by many, who have no clue who you are or that you exist. If you can produce some paperwork that YOU PERSONALLY are the RCC or CC please do. Then I will address you as Catholic person.....so what you are actually doing is rude, because others may not believe as you do and don't like you speaking for them. And Nicole, husbands don't own wives....or control what their name should be or whether they should be called by their name or not. Not even in Church. Remember Sarah told Abraham to throw Hagar and her son out...and he did what she asked.
---kathr4453 on 10/12/19


Kathr:...and singling out my friend and calling her sister and not the others is rude, and exercises excluding others.//

That's rich of you.

Yet, when someone tells you to use a certain name and you refuse isn't rude?

Some women are non confrontation. So, they ask their husbands to speak for them. The same for husbands

It's their marriage and yours.

Stop worrying why the Pastor's wife not telling the congregational herself

I know many people who are called by a nasty nickname and had to be told to stop by a stronger person.

It wouldn't address as sister even if she asked you.

Remember I have asked you to stop calling my Church 'Roman'.

Have you? No.

Now, isn't that rude?.
---Nicole_Lacey on 10/12/19


This is not a Catholic Church with women being nuns. I call my Christian friends by their name. They know they are my sister in Christ. But just say I did that, and a group of other women are with her ....I'm not gonna address them as sister, because I don't know that they are...and singling out my friend and calling her sister and not the others is rude, and exercises excluding others.
---kathr4453 on 10/11/19


Cluny, thanks for the info. I didn't know. I just picked out a name as an example. My scieno still applies.

StrongAxe, you would assume wrong.

Most Protestant usage of that title is only due to Jesus being our Brother since we are His Father's adopted Children.

Thus making us brothers and sisters to each other.

Even in the my religious congregation which made us more family members to each other (spending feast days together rather than with our biological family.

Also our Living Will supersedes any biological family's rights to funeral arrangements)

Yet, we NEVER dropped the title 'Sister' when addressing each other. But our biological family did drop that title.
---Nicole_Lacey on 10/11/19


Nicole, what makes you think they won't?
---kathr4453 on 10/11/19


Kathr, why does the wife have to tell everyone to call her sister?
If they refuse to listen to the Pastor what makes you think they will listen to her?
---Nikki_Lacey on 10/10/19


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Nicole, Justice Ginsberg has been a widow since 2010.

Glory to Jesus Christ!
---Cluny on 10/11/19


Nicole_Lacey:

You wrote: I am sure Justice Ginsburg isn't called 'Justice' by her husband, family or friends.

I would expect that members of the same congregation would at least consider themselves friends, especially since a family relationship (implied by titles like brother, sister, etc.) are even CLOSER than friendship.
---StrongAxe on 10/11/19


They should follow their Pastor's request. Not just because he is the Pastor, but because she is his wife.

But I guess it because I understand him since people keep calling my religion by another name even after asked them not to say that name.

Anywho, 'sister' is a title to show respect in a general sense. As are 'Mr, Ms, Mrs, Doctor, Senator, President, Justice' and the like.

And it doesn't imply they are better than you.

Calling someone by his or her first name denote a special familiarity.

I am sure Justice Ginsburg isn't called 'Justice' by her husband, family or friends.

But maybe called Justice at her Synagogue

Besides, if someone doesn't wish to follow his Pastor, why stay in that Church?
---Nicole_Lacey on 10/10/19


Strongaxe, it sounds like many in the church described above many find it uncomfortable as well, and refuse to submit to the pastors rules or request, hoping for change. I don't know if this is a new pastor or if the woman above is the one new to the church. The questioner should be asking those in her church WHY they don't call her Sister, but by her name. Maybe new folks coming in the Church find it is old school and cultish.

But as I said originally....the woman/ wife should be the one standing in the pulpit requesting she be called Sister ...rather than her husband. Maybe she wants to be called by her name...and the Pastor doesn't want that...thinking the man rules and women are less than...
---kathr4453 on 10/10/19


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kathr4453:

As I mentioned earlier, there are some extremely religious groups where everybody calls each other "brother" or "sister" in second person, or "brother Fred or "sister Karen" in third person. personally, I find such formalism unnatural, uncomfortable, and excessive, but others may be fine with it.
---StrongAxe on 10/9/19


And of course we would need to see EVERY TIME a Woman is named Would have to be consistent ...like "Pricilla our sister" EVERY TIME, .and we don't see that in scripture or Cluny's ONE VERSE WONDER HE TWISTED..it certainly was not carried over from Israel.

But reading up on the issue, it is not Biblical but traditional, and many would like to do away with it. Some say it's rude, making others feel their not in the family, and others say they simply want to be called by their name. So it might be a dying tradition many in the Church above here are trying to do away with, but the Pastor doesn't.
---kathr4453 on 10/9/19


Yes I do...there is no comparison. To constantly address Phebe as "Phebe our sister" everytime you are talking to her would be bazaar and redundant.

But hay Cluny, if it makes you feel better to see no difference than believe what you want.
---kathr4453 on 10/8/19


\\Phoebe is her name
sister not even with a CAP with "sister" is not even a TITLE here. \\

And you actually think this is significant?

Did you know that upper case letters did not exist in ancient languages, such as Biblical (Koine) Greek?

Bet you didn't.

Glory to Jesus Christ!
---Cluny on 10/7/19


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Sorry it does not say SISTER PHEBE here in that verse.

Nice try...

Phoebe is her name
sister not even with a CAP with "sister" is not even a TITLE here.

For a TItle it would have to be Sister Phebe. Like MOTHER Theresa.
---kat453 on 10/7/19


\\No scripture addresses any women as Sister this or that, so it must me a MAN MADE thing. \\

Here's another verse that apparently is not in kath's Bible:

Romans 16:1
"King James Bible
I commend unto you Phebe our sister, which is a servant of the church which is at Cenchrea:''

kath, I'm sure that I'm not the only person on these blogs who has noticed you simply don't know the Bible as well as YOU think you do.

Glory to Jesus Christ!
---Cluny on 10/6/19


Strongaxe, My belief is that we are all one in Christ, as we are taught in the Body of Christ, that no one is superior to another, not even a pastor. I think you might have the Orthodox and RCC and those kind of organizations in mind. But Churches I've attended, CM & A and Baptist, ect have a different perspective ....we believe the Pastor is in submission to the body, who hired them and can fire them

But again, my issue was...Let the wife stand at the pulpit addressing the congregation herself and let her say with her own lips....PLEASE DO NOT CALL ME BY MY NAME, CALL ME SISTER. ...that's all. Since there is no scripture insisting women be called SISTER, it's a personal request, not a legalistic one.
---kathr4453 on 10/7/19


kathr4453:

Titles can be confusing, as it may not be clear whom one is addressing. Names are more precise.

Calling one another "brother" or "sister" is practiced in strongly religious groups. I think Pentecostals and Baptists do it, and so do Jehovah's Witnesses.

Using titles rather than their names typical in class-oriented societies, which is why Americans often address people by their first names.

I would have expected that the Christian Church, which is supposedly egalitarian, would also do this. Why should a pastor or his wife "deserve" more respect than others? Jesus taught humility by having apostles wash each other's feet. He said the greatest among us should be our servant.
---StrongAxe on 10/6/19


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So show scripture Cluny that Pastors lord it over another....another personal opinion you stated without showing scripture.

No scripture addresses any women as Sister this or that, so it must me a MAN MADE thing.

Now I understand in the RCC and maybe Orthodox addressing Nuns as Sister and Mother ....but never heard of it insisted upon in other denominations. Then we have Sister Wives...

The wife of the Pastor needs to speak for herself....

Maybe people feel uncomfortable calling her Sister because it seems like RCC...
---kathr4453 on 10/6/19


\\her God given name is WHO she is.\\

BCV, please, kathr.

I'd rather see scripture than your own personal opinion.

In my own experience, it's generally the parents who give their offspring their names.

Glory to Jesus Christ!
---Cluny on 10/6/19


When in doubt, follow your pastor's advice.

Glory to Jesus Christ!
---Cluny on 10/6/19


Sister is WHAT she is, her God given name is WHO she is. Id rather be a WHO than a WHAT.

For the pastor to make this request, ...id have to ask, did the request come from his wife in the first place, and why isn't she personally asking others to address her as Sister, or is the Assemblies of God a Church that keeps women down, so down that they can't even have a name.

Or is it putting Sister in front of her name, like Sister Beth?

Why is is less respectful to address one by their name. Children should not address adults by their first name, unless the adult says its ok, but you are all adults.

Paul called many women by their first name. Never once saw a "Sister Priscilla" in scripture.
---kathr4453 on 10/6/19


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